HIGH

Chapter 21 Dreams

brvdfordmalik.tumblr.com*****

I want to get addicted to you*****

***Zayn's POV***

Power goes to my head when it comes to shit like this. When she was standing there in front of me, small and almost fragile I lost it.

Over the past few days I've lost that power. She was the reason for that. She snatched it unknowingly away from me causing me to lose the respect I've worked so hard to gain. I'm nearly back at the start. And it's so fucking frustrating.

So when she stood there in front of me, so close, I lost it. I wanted to break her, snap her. I wanted that power over her and I wanted to show that bitch who was in charge. She didn't have a say in anything; she was mine and I called the shots not her. And that is how it started off, at first. I basically sprung on her within seconds of coming up with a brilliant plan of fucking her until she regretted everything. But then something clicked and we just started kissing. Kissing then turned into hunger and I could feel the same want coming from her as well. When we broke apart, when we woke up, the thing that had clicked was gone. The same hatred I felt for her was back. I preferred it that way.

I was angry at myself for being so gentle. I acted caring towards her when I shouldn't have showed any emotion whatsoever. I didn't want to be the one sending mixed signals. That meant nothing to me. She's just another slut I've scooted out the door and sent away in a cab. Only this time she couldn't leave. Yet.

I repeatedly slammed my hands on the steering wheel of the car. I was sat at a red light in traffic. The old lady in the car beside me kept shooting me dirty looks to which I responded with a small flick of my middle finger. She shook her head in disgust then paid me no more attention. I sighed and closed my eyes in attempt to calm myself down. This was getting to be all too much.

***

"So you fucked?" Liam asked between bites of a sandwich. Liam was one of the first people I had met when I first came here to the US. We're close I guess you could say.

"Keep your fucking voice down! Yeah. Yeah we did. But it wasn't like- like I don't know. Like, I didn't eat her out and she didn't give me a blow- mate, I basically stuck my dick in her and we were done in minutes."

"And this is the same girl that John went after? The same girl you 'saved'?" Liam finished eating then sat back on his couch. I had called him this morning asking to meet him after an argument Alec and I had over the phone. Luckily, Ava slept through it all. Didn't hear a thing.

"I didn't fucking save her. You very well know I didn't. S'not like that."

Alec was such an asshole. He kept saying one thing then doing another. It was beginning to get annoying. Not worth my time. I hate the fact that I'm fucking around with these dickheads still. I could be on my own doing the exact same thing I'm doing now. Talking to these guys, except for a few, was like talking to a wall. They were either stoned out of their minds, rocking back and forth with glazed eyes or jumping at any chance for sex. I wasn't like some of the guys. Most of them actually.

Liam made a face at me, mocking me kissing someone. I glared at him, not realizing my hand was curled to a fist.

"Chill out, bro. Just wait another week and she'll be outta your hair. Alec set a date yet?" A loud clatter of pots and pans erupted from the kitchen. There was a little yelp that followed quickly after and then it went quiet. I raised an eyebrow at Liam. He brushed it off with a shrug of the shoulders. I decided not to ask any questions in fear he'd question me more about..her. The first few days after she moved in he was all over me. Asking if she was hot and shit. And the whole time, I zoned out thinking about how screwed up my life is.