HIGH

Chapter 44. Self

***ZAYN’S POV***

                I don’t think I’ve ever felt so angry before. The strong feeling made my blood boil and heat prick my skin. And blinded by rage while I had hit him, twice actually. A rush had made its way into my head and before I knew what I was doing, I was recoiling my fist after it connected with George’s deserving face. I felt no remorse nor did I feel like I had done something wrong. I didn’t have to justify my actions to anyone especially Alec.

 I had failed her. She was sat less than a foot away from me. Her body was so close to me. I let this happen to her. I should have watched her more carefully. I should have kept my hands away from her, maybe it could’ve prevented her not paying attention to George slipping whatever kind of narcotic it was into her drink. But I couldn’t stop myself from doing that, I had to touch her. I had to be closer to her for my own selfish reasons not for her safety or protection. It was my greedy hands that had started the game between us. My doing was nearly her ending.

This feeling of anger and guilt was a nasty mixture. As I was driving, the combination clouded my thoughts. My hands gripped the steering wheel so hard I was sure it might break. I sped past stop signs and flew through red lights. I had to take her somewhere; anywhere except the hospital. If I brought her to the hospital I’d lose her for sure. And I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t fail a second time. I was pissed at myself for how I was reacting. This shouldn’t affect me so harshly. Obviously I felt guilty but the fear of something even more terrible happening to her had me incontestably shaking with fear. If this is how I acted now, how would I deal with future events?

My phone continually vibrated on the console. I didn’t even bother answering whoever was calling. I declined the call and quickly scrolled through my contact list.

“Louis.” I croaked into the speaker.

“Do you even realize what time it is? It’s like fucking two in the morning!” Louis barked at me.

His snarky tone didn’t faze me. I’d done plenty for him at much more undesirable hours. In all honesty I didn’t realize we had stayed so late. Ava and I had been at this dinner for much longer than I intended. Again, my fault.

“Look, you know I wouldn’t call you this late if it wasn’t important.”

“What do you want?”

“George was at the party. He spiked her drink. Now she’s out cold. I have no idea what he gave her and I need you to take a look at her. She’s breathing fine and it appears she’s just sleeping but I want you to check.” I took a left onto the street leading to Louis’ house. Whether he wanted to or not, he was making sure she was okay.

“Alec must be pissed.” Louis muttered.

“Fuck him. I’m coming up your street now. Be there in two.”

“The things I do for you, asshole.”

The line went dead as I pulled into the driveway. Personally, I preferred my house over Louis’. My current home that is. Mine is much larger and feels lived in. Louis’ is smaller but seems more spaced out. I parked the car as close to the front walkway as possible. I was sure I had parked on the lawn was well.

Louis opened the front door and came padding out shirtless while in pajama bottoms. I jumped out of the driver’s seat and opened the back door to get Ava.

She looked so peaceful with her eyes closed and the darkness made her skin glow against the deep color of her dress. Under the influence of drugs she visually managed to drive me insane. That was fucked up on more levels than one. I gently pulled the upper half of her body into my arms and was about to pass her to Louis for help when I stopped short.