After all this time im still into you

Chapter 10

I never thought it would be possible to miss someone you never knew. Emma was always in my mind and I still blame my self for her dying. If I didn't pick her then she would still be her right now. Jeremy and Taylor kept telling me that it wasn't me but I still believe I caused it.


I sat in a restaurant with Jeremy and Taylor. They where both stuffing there face where as I was picking at my food.


" When are you going to actually eat something " Taylor's said. I looked up at him and shrugged my shoulders. I looked back down at my salad. " What the hell is wrong with you. you have been right for 2 weeks "


" Maybe because Emma killed herself because of me " I replied

" For the millionth time you didn't do anything it was her fault for killing her self. she was the one who done it not you. just because you picked her to sing with you doesn't make it your fault. just grow up and learn that you never done anything wrong "


I looked at him in shock " do you know what I have grown up and I know that I caused her to kill herself. so just leave me alone and get it through your head I done it to her " I said and then grabbed my jacket before storming out of the restaurant.



It's been two weeks since Emma died and I still keep thinking it was all my fault. It was though of I never picked her to sing with me she would be here today. We where in Washington today. we had a day off so we where going to get lunch and then go to the movies or something but that's wrecked now. I walked down the street still pissed off.


" Hayley can you take a picture with me "a girl asked. I smiled at her and walked over


" Sure " I replied. her mom took the picture and then I walked away.


" Hayley " she shouted. I turned around and looked at her " I love you " she said


" I love you to angel " I said before walking away. I loved my fans to bits and every time they said love you to me I always said it back.



I walked down the road not knowing where I was going. I occasionally got stopped by fans wanting autographs or pictures. I noticed a Starbucks and went inside and ordered a drink.



I brought my phone out my pocket and noticed a text from Taylor


Hayley I'm so sorry. where are you ?


I didn't know whether to text back or just leave it. I sat down outside Starbucks and went on twiter. I went on Emma's profile and looked through it. Just by reading some of her tweets you could tell that she was crying out for help. I looked through her followers and came across Hannah from a couples of weeks ago. I went on her profile and looked through it. I decided to follow her. she would probably go crazy when she went in her twitter and noticed I followed her. I decided to text Taylor back


" I'll meet u back at the bus. " I text and then got up from where I was sitting and made my way back to the bus.





When I got there Taylor was sitting at the back of the bus. I walked up and sat next to him


" I'm so sorry for what I said in the restaurant. I just hate seeing you blame yourself for Emma dying. It wasn't you fault and you have to believe me and Jeremy " he said as he looked into my eyes



" But I can't help but think it's my fault. there was hundreds of people there I could have picked one of them yet I picked her " I said as I turned away from him

" Hayley listen to me it wasn't your fault she was probably in a bad place and feeling depressed for a while and she just wanted to end it all. you made her dream come true. so even if you didn't pick her she would have killed herself anyway to get away from the pain. I know it sounds harsh but it's true and you have to learn that you never done anything "



Taylor was right if she was depressed then she would have ended up killing herself even if I didn't pick her " your right is never made her do it. " I said and Taylor pulled me Into a hug


" Of course you didn't " he said as he played with my hair


" Guys I'm bored let's go to the cinema " Jeremy said. I stopped hugging Taylor and looked at Jeremy

" Sure." I said

" Come on then let's get moving " he said as he walked away. me and Taylor got up and followed him out of the bus. the cinema was only a 5 minuet walk away. I held Taylor's hand as we walked



" I'm so glad your happy again " he said and then kissed my head


" Same " I said and then kissed him



What happened to Emma wasn't my fault she was in a bad place for a while and she was depressed. I guess I hair had to think a bit to realize that her killing her self wasn't my fault....