Faking It

20

As a little girl, snow had always been a one of my most favourite nostalgic memories I had growing up.

My family and I would spend hours playing outside in the snow until our lungs were full of so much laughter and joy they could burst. 

My father would help build snowmen as I helped my little sister gather the decorations needed to bring the snowy creature to life, my mother would make her famous hot cocoa and peanut butter cookies inside as the fire warms the house into a home as we make our way inside for our annual Christmas movie marathon around this time of year.

So as you can see from my previous experience, the winter holidays have always held a special place in my heart.

Until now, that is.

Because now, the association to snow is being trapped inside my apartment complex with Noah at 2am because a heavy layer of snow guards the door better than any security on campus.

And until it was cleared, no one was getting in, or out.

It's only been 2 hours and we've already separated into different rooms. I've locked myself in my own as he lays in the living room.

I decided that silent treatment was the best decision towards Noah, then I wouldn't spill anything I could regret.

What can I say, I like to be the bigger person.

Until my stomach started to grumble with greed, that is.

Damn cotton candy and it's non- nutritional value.

I couldn't face him.

I didn't know if it was my level of stubbornness  towards everything that's happened or if it were the embarrassment that he was right.

Either way, I didn't want to face the thick cloud of tension that was secluded by my bedroom door.

But, my hunger was growing stronger and I knew that if I didn't actually eat a meal that wasn't cotton candy, I might combust.

Not really but you catch my drift.

Climbing out of bed, begrudgingly,  I peer open my door slowly and as quietly as possible, silently hoping that Noah had fallen asleep and this would be a breeze to the fridge.

Looking around, I notice Noah was no longer in the living room where I left him. I was met with silence and an empty apartment.

Confusion  soon left as I gathered he had left for the lobby or possibly another friends apartment.

Before I let the small part of me that was hurt crumble over, my apartment door opens and in walks in the man of the hour.

I felt like a deer in headlights as we stayed staring at each other in shock.

Probably more shocked that I left my room.
Gathering confidence once more, I give a blank look before walking into my kitchen to look for something to eat, ignoring the burning gaze against my back.

Deciding on a hot cup of tea and some left over pasta, I make my way to the microwave to heat up my meal and then to make myself a hot cup of tea to hopefully soothe the cold that spread over my body suddenly. 

My mind began to trail off as tiredness had washed over me, watching the hot water boil.

"You kept it from everybody April, I understand that this may be your way of dealing with things but you can't keep secrets forever, especially in this situation. He could have seriously hurt you, mentally or physically— either way, he hurt you. And us being the people that care about you, we will help you in anyway, regardless if you agree or not."