The Infected

Chapter 73

~•~ Chapter 73 ~•~

I was hiding it inside of me. I knew what was going on and how this was going to end. I could just feel it. I wasn't going to lie to myself. I dodn't want to believe in lies and hope for the best when everything around me screamed at me the truth.

I didn't want to lie to myself. But I lied to him.

He was already too broken and pressed to face the truth. I could see it every time he looked at me, how much he wanted to help me. I didn't want him to lose hope, despiteme losing it. I knew what was going to happen and I had accepted it. But he didn't.

He just couldn't.

Isn't it just odd how us, human beings prefer the truth, but seek for comfort in lies?

He needed to be reminded that there is a chance for me to get better. Liam kept saying he can help me, but I highly doubted it. How could he help me, when he couldn't help all those people back in the hideout?

Harry had totally skipped and ignored that part of the story, for his own sake. He was so scared of pain, he made himself think I was going to be alright, that Liam was going to find a way, despite not being able to do that all these months.

Our conditions were no better than the hideout and time was running low.

I knew what was going to happen.

I knew.

So as I watched at the boys planning how to go on a search around the desk in the dim light, I felt my chest heavy. Despite the pain in my head and the shivers, I could make out perfectly what I was feeling because of the virus and what because of the guilt.

Seeing the boys trying to find a way to go out there and face the danger for me made me feel so useless and guilty. Just the thought of one of them getting hurt or even worse crashed me. I hated the fact that my headache wouldn't let me stand up and fight.

I looked up at the round clock on the wall to see that it was 11:45pm. The boys were planning to leave midnight. My stomach knotted with anxiety. My stiff body shivered in this uncomfortable couch and my head felt heavy. I hadn't grown worse, nor better.

“Can't sleep, huh?" Thomas dragged me from my thoughts, laying on his stomach on the other couch next to mine. He has been much better than before. His back had stopped bleeding and he didn't hurt that much, but he still needed stitches.

I slowly shook my head. "No..as much as I want to, I can't."

"Same." He sighed.

I looked back at the boys and pursed my lips. They had been arguing and suggesting things for the past thirty minutes and I hardly believed they would actually make a decision in the end. Zayn was sighing every now and then, asking for a cigarette. Louis was typically sarcastic, while Niall and Harry seemed to get deep in thought and deny every suggestion.

Liam was resting, staring outside the foggy window with a deep frown plastered across his face. He was obviously thinking of ways to help us all, drowning in his own feelings. He would stay with us in case anything happened to us, so he didn't have to have a say in the boys' plan.

"It's pointless." I muttered, shaking my head. "They don't have to go."

"Of course they do. We have to help you." Thomas said.

I turned to give him a frustrated look. "Why should we risk 4 lives for 1? We all know they won't find what we need." I argued.

"They have to try. Claire, we can't just leave you like that. We are a team, we always have each other's backs. Liam said you got chances." He insisted, shifting his upper body, propping himself on his elbows, shoulders hunching.