Sing and Dance

Grandpa

My grandpa died yesterday
I was told today
But without knowing, I already knew
I'd seen it in the news
They talked about a man
He did something bad
Then they said he took his own life
And they even said his name
I recognized the name, but I thought it was coincidence
But just today I learned of his disappearance
Turns out he disappeared last week
Without a clue, no one knew what to think
My family told me he'd been acting strange
Before he left without a trace
And then, here's the story
Out of the blue on my tv
A man with my grandpa's name
Doing something insane
And it makes me quite sad
Those who see the news probably believe he was bad
But I knew him before, I knew him before the meds
Before the pain, pills, depression
But how can he be dead?
I didn't see it coming, I didn't even believe it was true
I didn't think it was him when I saw it on the news!
And now there are people out there who only know him from the tv
But if only they knew him like me!
He was cheerful, he was kind, how a grandpa should be
But then the sickness and pills turned him topsy-turvy
He stayed in his room, a hermit to all of us
He hid from the world, he hid from all of us
And although he took his life yesterday
He died way before then, he'd already gone away
But none of us knew he was gone, he'd taken his own way
And now after all of this, I sit here today
Wondering how none of us knew of his true pain
And thinking about how I wish they all knew him when he was okay
I wish they knew him, what he was like, before the sickness took him away
Wish they knew that he's more than the man who'd gone insane
And wishing that we'd known, so I wouldn't be here thinking this way
I didn't get to say goodbye, that's what hurts the most
That's what's causing this pain in my head, chest and throat
I miss him quite dearly, I miss my grandpa
I miss who he truly was, when he was off
Those stupid fucking pills that brought him such pain
The stupid fucking thoughts that fucked with his brain
And I just want to see him once again
And tell him I love him, again and again

And I'm no good with goodbyes, to be truthful I'm still in shock
And I'm no good at dealing, I can't cry even though my heart feels like a rock
But goodbye anyway, grandpa I'll miss you
And I'm sorry I didn't get to see you recently, or tell you I love you