Life {Adopted By Zalfie}

Memories

'Are you okay' I keep getting asked, what am I meant to say, I've lost my little sister and I'm alone. It really gets annoying when staff and other children ask if your okay all the time, like of course I'm not alright I don't have anyone left here all I really have is Mrs Dash and all the kids here but it's not fair that I'm all alone.

I cuddled up on my bed with my bear onesie on and phone by my pillow as I let a tear role down my cheek, I was meant to be going to school today but I didn't want to. I ignored the knock on my door as I pretended to be asleep since it was the morning and I didn't want to get up and go to schools "Filipa it's time to get up" I hear Mrs Dash say as my door creaks open

I keep my eyes closed and pretend to be asleep. I hear Mrs Dash's foot steps walking over to my bed "come in Filipa wake up sweetie" Mrs dash speaks again as she shakes me slightly and I groan as I open my eyes "i don't feel to good" I mumble in a lie "what's wrong which you?" Mrs dash asks me and I shrug "I feel sick" I whisper

"Alright, you can have today off but your going back to school tomorrow" Mrs Dash tells me with a nod "I'll bring you a glass off water, would you like some toast?" Mrs Dash asks me and I shake my head "just water please Mrs Dash" I answered her and she nodded as she left the room to get my water, I let a tear trickle down my cheek.

I layed their turning my music on quietly before putting my phone back down on my pillow while I lay looking up at my ceiling letting my music play softly in my room. Soon Mrs Dash joined me in my room and I sat up thanking her for my drink "come find me if you need anything" Mrs Dash tells me and I nod "I know your missing Karolina but she is in a better place" mrs Dash tells me and I look at her wide eyed

I just wanted to scream at her saying she didn't know anything, she didn't know how I felt! I didn't want to lose my rag but soon I couldn't hold it in "Poprostu mnie zostaw! Nic nie wiesz! Karolina nie jest martwy, więc przestać mówić tak, jakby ona jest" I ended up screaming in Polish at her
-( this means' Just leave me alone! You know nothing! Karo isn't dead so stop speaking as if she is! )

"Filipa calm down! I don't understand what your saying" Mrs Dash responds "just leave me alone" I shout and Mrs dash nods leaving me to calm down I lean over the side off my bed and pick up my memory box again like I did last night and open the lid. I've got loads of things from living in Poland and pictures off the whole family.

I looked at the one from Anita's 18th birth. It was me, Anita and Karolina, I was going to be 13 in five months and Karolina was a week old and I smiled weakly, two months after the picture mum, dad and Anita died in the horrible planet crash. Why couldn't I have been on the plane, I would have been with my parents when it happened and not with Grandma Amanda and grandpa Ian.

Yeah every year it's either been me or Anita staying with our grandparents but if I went back with mum dad that means Karolina would have been on her own for the last year but it also means she could have been fostered way before now, your probably thinking 'your just saying that because your sister has gone' but no I'm not! The truth is I've thought like this for probably the whole year since they died.

I place the picture on my bed and pick out another picture, it was a picture of me, dad, Grandma Inga and Grandpa Oskar, I was little  but I can't remember what age I was, I think probably the age of six or seven but I don't think I was any younger or older than that.

I continue looking through my pictures and let a single tear drop every now and then. I found my old teddy what I had gotten when I was born and I keep it in my box. In my box I have pictures,  my teddy, my baby things. I've also got most off my valuables from Poland aswell as mums and Anita's Things like their bracelets and earrings and Anita's 18th necklace, I've got a jumper off dads which still smells like him and a bunch of Anita's clothes and mums but only things like jumpers and all they. They make me feel safe and like their still here even though I know their actually not.

After probably a hour off looking through some off my memories I put the box away since I had began to become a bit emotional from looking at all the pictures. I cuddled down again and closed my eyes before falling asleep with my music still playing.

I woke up again at lunch time so I headed downstairs and found Mrs Dash in the kitchen "would you like anything?" She asks me and I nod "could I have some toast please?" I ask Mrs Dash softly and she nods popping two slices of bread into the toaster and letting it cooked before it popped up and she handed me it on a plate.

I ate it plane before going back to my room and went on my phone for abit as I had nothing else to do.

A/N

A short chapter because the next one is going to be longer and I didn't want a long skip so hope you all enjoyed and that's it for now

Bye 💖

Jess xx