Tearing Paper

Save Yourself

It took Nate ten minutes to finally force his feet to walk towards the white gate in front of him.

Ella’s family loved elegance. Even when their daughter was lying helplessly on a hospital bed, Ella’s parents still took time to take good care of their house. Nate silently admired the small yet iridescent garden welcoming him as he walked inside—it gave the gloomy autumn a little summery ambiance. After rubbing his sweaty palms on his jeans, he collected himself and knocked the door.

“Nathan,” the house maid greeted. It had been a while since she saw him visit. “Ella is in her room. Her parents are out golfing.”

“Thank you, Lisa,” Nate cleared his throat and took the stairs. It pained him that he still remembered every detail about that simple yet beautiful house.

“Ella?”

Nate knew Ella wasn’t the type of person to lock doors, but he still waited for her reply.

“Nate?” He heard footsteps approaching the door. Ella opened it—her hair was neatly tied in a bun, and Nate knew she just finished her weekly evening pedicure.

So she was living her life as she used to.

“Wow, I never knew you would visit me,” Ella smiled, letting him inside. Her room was neat and clean as usual—and Nate sat on the round couch by the window. “I’m glad to know you’re—you’re okay.”

“There is a time for everything,” Ella quoted that famous verse from the Bible that Nate knew she loved so much. “I guess my recovery’s just another proof that God exists.”

“And He is infinite,” Nate said, almost to himself, remembering how it was the exact same thing he told Ella after their graduation years ago.

Everything was so different back then…

“Can you stop pretending like everything is okay?” Ella suddenly said, her voice turned much hoarser as she turned away from Nate’s eyes. “You’re not here just to visit.”

“What?”

“You’re here because you’re devastated. That Dianne girl that replaced me—she’s gone, right? It’s not the first time she ran away from a guy. So why don’t you save yourself and move on already? I know about her. And I know she’s a hell of a slut who doesn’t deserve you, Nate.”