Asylum For Aisling

Chapter 25

I gasped bubbled past my lips as I stumbled backwards from the glass. My eyes widened to the point that I thought that they were going to pop out of my head. My mouth was set in an 'o' of horror as I stared at the beautiful monster in front of me.

His dark orbs followed my every move. I was really beginning to wonder if he could see me. My head swiveled around to Doc who was watching me intently. My mouth opened and closed as questions bounced around in my head, but none of them made an appearance on my lips.

"He can't see you." Doc stated, nodding at the glass. Harry's gaze drifted from mine and over to Doc, winking at him before settling back on me.

I threw my hands up, waving them around wildly in my confusion. I slapped my forehead, pacing back and forth as my head ran in circles. How had this happened? How had I let this happen? Surely I could have broken the glass or found a way to open the door to stop Louis before it had gotten to the point where he blacked out. I could have found a way to stop him from hitting his head.

"Why?" I breathed out.

Doc sighed before taking one of the chairs and pulling it out for him to sit in. He took his glasses off and rubbed his eyes tiredly. He pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled loudly before motioning me to join him. I grabbed the other chair, but moved it so I was sitting right in front of the glass again. I sat with the back of the chair against my chest so I could rest my head on the top.

"The tests say that his last thoughts before he was knocked out were violent. You were included, but I don't think that at the time, he was thinking about you the way he is now. While he was in the state of unconsciousness, his brain went into over-drive, panicking. His thoughts became jumbled, so the memory of the punishment mixed with you came together. So now he wants revenge on you, I believe. Aisling, I am so sorry." Doc explained.

"I-I don't get it." I muttered, eyebrows drawn together and forehead creasing.

"While he was unconscious, his brain panicked because of the traumatic experience, colliding his most recent memories together. He remembered you and he remembered the punishment. His mind put the two together, and now he fully believes that it was all your doing."

Harry sat down directly in front of me, attention still locked on me. We sat there in silence, me watching Harry, Doc looking through the file on the table which I assume was Harry's, and my dimpled boy stared at the glass where I was seated.

That's how it went for the next few hours.

The only sounds that filled my half of the room were the shuffling of papers as Doc sorted through them, sighing occasionally as he did so. He would mumble to himself in irritation as the answers to his questions remained well hidden. His frustration was reaching new heights as the answers didn't pop up in the sheets he was sifting through.

I watched the way Harry's chest rose and fell as he breathed. I watched as his eyelashes fluttered as he blinked. I watched as his harsh glare never let up, burning holes into me. I watched as the boy that was different than anyone here slipped away from me.

This was what Sister Elizabeth wanted all along.

She wanted to take Harry from me, and she had achieved just that.

She stripped this boy from his skin full of love, and threw on an outfit stuffed with hatred and anger.

"Why is he in a straight jacket?" I whispered. My throat was thick and scratchy as emotions swirled around in me.

"He kept rambling on about how he was going to break out of the room and snap your neck, so I decided that it would be best to restrain him. I had attendants both inside and outside the room to keep him in line, but I thought the jacket would help." Doc's voice was distant.

"Oh, right." I nodded my head nonchalantly.

I stared at Harry for a minute longer before mustering up the courage to voice the one question that had been nagging my mind since I sat down, "Doc, do you think I could go in there to see him?" I asked tentatively.

"You can see him clearly right there, Aisling." Doc replied evenly, attention still focused on the work before him.

"But Doc, he can't actually see me. Maybe if I were to go in there and talk to him, his mind would snap back and he would realize that he didn't really want to hurt me. I can't just sit here knowing that with every moment that passes, more ways of killing me are swirling around in his head." I sighed, glancing back at Harry who had an amused look on his face.

"No, Aisling. You cannot go in there and that's final." Doc spoke sternly, lifting his head from the papers that threatened to drown him and staring at me with what I could assume was his 'do as I say' look.

So, that basically meant do the opposite of whatever he had just said.

"Was the door that leads to his room the one next to ours?"I asked quizzically.

"Aisling..." Doc began, but immediately stopped when another voice cut in.

"Let her come, Doc." Harry cooed, voice dark.

"Aisling, don't you dare. " Doc warned me, standing up from his chair and beginning to make his way over to me.

"I have to know, Doc!" I shouted before standing up quickly, shoving my chair at him to give me just enough time to slip around him, grab his keys, and sprint out of the room.

I grabbed the handle to the other door, rammed the key in, and twisted, gliding right in. As soon as I slammed the door behind me, I locked it into place to stop Doc from entering as easily as I had. I closed my eyes and sighed a breath of relief as I heard his fists pounding on the door. That was when my crystal eyes slowly traveled up in front of me to see the entirety of the boy towering over me.

"It took you a while, Aisling." Harry chuckled darkly.

"AISLING, LET ME IN RIGHT NOW! AISLING!" Doc's shouts were muffled by the door that separated us.

"Looks like he can't protect you from everything, can he?" Harry sneered, leaning down closer to me.

I scoffed, "I don't need to be protected from you ."

He took a tiny step forward so that we were almost touching chest to jacket, "You should rethink that, love."

"You know what you need to rethink? Me. Your brain is all fucked up now and you don't even know me anymore, okay? SNAP OUT OF IT!" I screamed in his face. He didn't flinch or show any signs of fear; it was all fury and hatred.

This only egged me on more. I wanted to get something out of him. I wanted a flash of remorse or even compassion to come across his features. It was just like one of the first times we met. We were in Solitary Confinement and I pushed him until he began to strangle me.

If it had to get to the point where that happened again, I was willing to take my chances. He was just like Pandora. He found some way to slither and creep his way into my heart. I felt something for this curly haired, dimpled face boy, and whatever it may be, I didn't want it to go away. If that meant that I had to get a bit roughed up in the process of returning him to normal, I was game.

"Do you even know what your condition is? Harry, do you even know what you are diagnosed with?" I titled my head as I looked up at him.

"Harry, I went through your file that day too. I know all about you. I know things about you that you don't even know. How does that feel? How do you feel about the fact that the girl that you want to kill right now knows more about you than you do? Hm?" I pressed.

He was still adorning his mask of anger, but something, if only briefly, ran across his eyes that told me that I was beginning to crawl under his skin. His jaw was clenched and his nostrils were flaring as the blacks of his orbs were smoldering under his glare.

"Aisling, stop! You're only angering him more!" Doc yelled again, banging on the door with a new purpose.

"So, do you want to know what your diagnosis is? Hm?" I caressed his cheek softly. I could feel his jaw tighten even more than before at my actions.

"Aisling, back the fuck off right now." He growled.

I smiled softly before running my hands through his curls. I looked him straight in the eyes before leaning up so my lips were brushing his ear, "You have Borderline Personality, Harry."

"Shut. The. Fuck. Up." He spat.

"No. You know what? You can't do a single fucking thing
about it. You're the one that's strapped into that jacket. I'm here free as a fucking bird while you're the one that's trapped. If I wanted to punch you, I could. Guess what you can't do? ANYTHING! YOU CAN'T DO A DAMN THING, HARRY!" I screamed in his face.

"I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU!" He roared.

"Good luck doing that without hands." I hissed, walking back towards the door.

"Don't you walk out that door, Aisling. We aren't finished here." His voice was eerily calm. At one time, this would have scared me shitless and I would have succumbed to his wish, but not today.

This approach wasn't going to do any good. If anything, I seriously had only pissed him off more, but it was worth a shot. I was willing to do anything to get Harry back. He was the only person I had left here, and I wasn't about to lose him entirely.

"Oh? This one?" I asked, placing my hand on the knob. "You don't want me to walk out of THIS door? Sorry, for a moment I almost forgot that you didn't own me. Wow, that sure was one crazy second. I'll see you later, Harry." I blew him a kiss as he took a step forward, eyes blazing. I unlocked the door and stepped out, almost running into Doc.

"Aisling what the hell were you thinking?!" Doc exploded, pulling me closer. His arms enveloped me, keeping me close as he breathed into my hair unsteadily.

"Doc, last time I checked, you never wanted me, so why are you suddenly acting like you do?" My voice was sharp as the emotions took their toll.

Pandora was gone.

Doc told me that he never wanted me.

And now Harry was in some delusional state where he wanted
to kill me.

My life was just un-fucking-believable.

He sighed, "Look Aisling, I was just having a stressful time. You and Harry are a deadly combo, and handling you is hard enough without having the male version standing tall beside you. I'm so sorry, Aisling. I shouldn't have taken it out on you."

I shrugged and nodded, acknowledging his words, "It's fine, Doc."

"No, Aisling. It really isn't. The one thing that it takes to break you and I ruined what I had. What tiny shard of trust you handed over to me, I cut it to pieces with the words I said. I'm so sorry." He held on tight to my shoulders as if keeping me from fleeing.

I plastered a reassuring smile to my face before grabbing his shoulders like he had done me, "It's fine, Doc." But in no way was it. He was right: I had given him some trust that he cut up to no return. That trust may never come back for him, but if there was anyone who would work their ass off to get it back, it was Doc. He was tied to me for as long as I was here anyway.

He merely shook his head before jerking his head back towards the door that was left wide open. I pursed my lips before walking back into the room where I could keep tabs on Harry. Once inside, I tossed the keys back on the table and resumed my position in my chair while Doc once again became flustered over the papers that were in an array scattered across the table.

Harry was in the corner of the room with back against the wall and knees brought up to his chest. His head was placed on the top of his knees as he glowered at me.

"Doc, how are we going to fix this?" I whispered.

"I'm not sure, Aisling." His voice conveyed exactly how he looked: tired.

"Go to bed, Doc."

"I can't just leave you here. Especially with his eyes trained on you like that. Before you showed up, he said a lot of terrible things. I don't want you here alone with him." Doc demanded.

I rolled my eyes, "I'm not here alone with him. There is a huge slab of glass between us. He's in a straight jacket too. I'm a big girl, I can handle myself. Go get your reset for tomorrow; you're going to need it. Oh, and I need you to find out how much damage I caused."

He chuckled, "What did you do this time that riled Sister Elizabeth up so bad?"

Smirking, I told him in a proud tone, "Broke almost every cup in the cafeteria, flipped a few tables, threw some chairs, dumped all of the food on the flood, stole a lot of light bulbs and smashed them everywhere, and I flooded the halls."

"Aisling!" His eyes widened and his mouth parted in shock. Then he began chuckling with morphed into full on laughter as he clutched his sides and his entire frame shook as the hilarity bubbled to the surface. "That is not funny, young lady. You - should - be - ashamed." Between his words, little chuckles cut him off.

"Would you like me to march myself down to her office, get on my knees, and beg for forgiveness for my sins?" I snickered at the thought.

I would burst through her doors and fall at her feet. I would clasp my hands together in front of me, looking up at her through my thick eyelashes. I would blubber with tears staining my cheeks, pleading to be forgiven.

No chance in hell.

His laughter kicked up again at my words. It took a while, but eventually the noise died down, and he was finally able to make coherent sentences, "Okay Aisling. I'll lock the door behind me. He's already been fed and taken to the bathroom, so if he says he needs either, he's lying. There is a tiny intercom in the corner over there. Hook it up to the wall and you'll be able to talk to him. Be smart, okay?"

"Got it, Doc." I flashed him the thumbs up and smiled at him.

"Oh, and if you-"

"Doc. Go. To. Bed. Now. I'll see you in the morning, yeah?" I tried shooing him out, but he had other plans.

He whipped around to face me one last time, "Aisling, I really am sorry. If you're sleeping in here like I bet you are, you should know that there are spare pillows and blankets in the supply closet right in there. Good night." He winked at me before exiting, locking the door behind him like he had said.

As soon as I head the door click shut, I dove out of the chair and moved over to the corner where the intercom was lying. I grabbed at it, staring at it in confusion as different colored cords wrapped around each other in a tangled mess. I groaned inwardly at the sight, but got straight to work at untangling the unruly cords.

Once they were spread out away from each other so that they couldn't even come close to tangling themselves up again, I dragged the intercom over to the wall and placed the plugs into the appropriate outlets. A tiny red light at the base of the microphone lit up, indicating that it was on. I beamed at it hopefully as I moved it over to the glass wall.

I sat down on the floor and stared at my beautiful monster. His harsh glare hadn't lessened in the slightest. Black and purple bruises were spread across his face. He had dark bags under his eyes that hollowed out the green orbs I had once been entranced in. His curls were matted together with what I assumed would have been sweat and blood. He looked terrible.

I clicked the tiny button on the base of the intercom, about to spit something out before I thought better of it. If I was going to say anything to him, it had to be thought out and calculated. I had to make him feel something like he had done to me. I had to know that they boy that crept up on my and planted himself in my heart was still in there behind that cold, hard exterior.

I had to find my Harry.

I had to get him back.

There were so many different times in that night that I held the button down, opened my mouth, and chickened out before any words could come out. I sat there contemplating how I would approach it. I stared at the curly haired devil and he stared right back. The hours passed, but nothing more happened. I would click the button, hold my breath, and then let go.

Even from where I was, I could see Harry's eyes glazing over as exhaustion settled in. He would try his hardest to suppress the inevitable yawns that forced their way out. It might have been a tiny movement, but I still caught the sagging of his shoulders as he slumped farther down the wall. His eyelids began to droop, and I felt relieved that maybe if he got some sleep, his brain would rewire itself or whatever and fix him.

"Stop staring at me as I sleep." He growled, eyes still clamped shut.

I grinned to myself before pushing the button and leaning into the speaker, "You aren't sleeping, so I'm technically not."

"Well then stop staring at me in general."

"What? I'm forbidden to stare at attractive people?" It was a good thing that we were on opposite sides of the glass because my cheeks were burning.

"You won't be able to stare at anybody when I gouge your eyes out." He spat.

Okay, back track.

"Harry, come back to me. Please." My voice was barely at a whisper as I voiced my thoughts.

"I'm right fucking here."

"Not you," I hissed, "The real Harry. The Harry that would wake me up in the worst possible way by somehow always knocking me on the floor. The Harry that I opened up to. The Harry that opened up to me. The Harry that I snuck out with and spent the day in my woods with. The Harry that broke my beloved swings. The Harry that stopped Rick from hitting me. The Harry that I was handcuffed to. The Harry that I enjoyed spending time with. I want the Harry that I liked back." It started off with venomous words, but by the end of it, the entire thing hit hard.

Little, insignificant things that Harry did made an impact on me. Whether it was the way that he threw his trash out just so the attendants wouldn't have to, or the way that he was hesitant to leave the building without permission because he was afraid of getting in trouble, or simply the way that I had his undivided attention when I spoke to him, these things really mattered.

The way that he was now, that wasn't my Harry.

"I just want my Harry back." I whispered as a single tear escaped my eye and slowly rolled down my cheek.

I felt foolish to cry. It wasn't going to bring him back, so why do it? The situation wasn't going to change because tears were falling, so what was the point? I sniffled and wiped at the tears furiously.

I thought that I had lifted my hand off of the button, but then I heard, "Aisling, are you crying?"

His voice had a pang of sympathy. I snapped my head up to look at him curled in on himself in the corner. His eyes were still glossy from sleep, but just barely detectable, there was sympathy. A sad smile lifted at my lips as I sniffled again.

"Yeah, Harry. I'm crying." I spoke softly, afraid to give away too many emotions. I thought for a moment that I had him back. Maybe, just maybe, my Harry was fighting his way to the surface and would return to me. I had hope for that second.

"Why?" His voice was equally low. He was about to continue before I saw the shift in his expression. It went from soft to hard in an instant. His eyes narrowed and darkened as his jaw tightened again, "I'm not strangling you yet."

My face fell as soon as the words left his lips. I laughed to myself as the tears now cascaded down my cheeks. Who was I kidding? I wasn't going to get anywhere with him. I nodded and pressed my lips in a tight line as hiccups threatened to pass them.

I lightly pressed on the intercom for the last time that night, "Goodnight Harry, wherever you may be."

I pushed the intercom away from me as I stood up and crossed the room to grab the pillows and blanket. I made my way back over to the window as I laid all my stuff down on the ground and snuggled into the blanket. At my side angle, I watched as Harry shifted himself so that he was also lying on his side facing me. I watched him as exhaustion washed over him, taking him under the current into a deep sleep.

One thing was for sure: When I woke up tomorrow, I would be on the floor, but it wouldn't be Harry's doing.


I was going to get my Harry back if it was the last thing I did.