Moments || Book Two

chapter 20

Fear.

Fear has it's own definition. It's a cross between what you think, and what others think of you. Most people believe the only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.

But really, our fears are more numerous than our dangers, and we suffer more in our imagination than in reality.

I have experienced this type of fear ever since I woke up from a dream-no, a nightmare, two days ago.

The dream that I had that night set me on edge, like something was bound to happen any second, but I had no clue when.

And it was all pointing towards one factor;

happiness.

Call me crazy, but the fact that people were happy for me and Niall made me delusional. I had been experiencing visions.

Visions of people being too happy, and being too happy can cause hatred.

It's ten o'clock in the morning, and I'm siting in bed with my tea in my hands. The warmth of the cup made my hands burn in sensation, but it brought me a sense of comfort.

There was no doubt my eyes were blood shot, maybe I looked a mess, but I had no notice to such. Because the only thing I could think about was happiness.

"I'm happy for you."

"I'm so happy you guys are back together."

"You guys make me happy. "

But the question is;

Was I happy they were happy?

Nonsense, of course I am.

"Dakota, honey I have toast." May spoke, knocking on the door in the process.

At the moment, I was staying with Louis and May. Since Rose and Harry had me for quite a while, I decided to get out of their hair for a bit. May took me in, gladly.

The door soon opened to a wide view and she came into my room, placing the tray in front of me as she neared the bed. She stood for a moment, but I eyed the food placed on my bed.

The toast was buttered, just the way I liked it. Also, she had placed some strawberries there as well.

"Dakota, what's wrong?" I looked up, her eyes were peering into my own. I only bit my lip, leaving the silence to herself and took a bite of the toast.

"Do you want me to call Niall over?" I stayed quiet, I didn't exactly know if I wanted him over or not.

Sure, Niall and I had just gotten back together, people were happy.

"May, is it right to have to please everyone?" I asked, looking up at her I began to realize my question was not very specific.

"Well, the main thing is, you must please yourself before anyone else." May took a seat on the bed, "So Dakota, tell me what's up. Did you and Niall have a fight?" I looked up at her with a dreadful look.

"No, we didn't. Niall and I are fine." I looked down at my bed sheet, fumbling with the edges as my mind moved in circles.

"We're perfect, actually." I whispered, now thinking of Niall. His eyes, his teeth, his hair, even his clothes.

"Then why have you been so-dull, lately." she asked, the question stumbled me for a while as well.

Why was I so dull?

Was I depressed?

"Let's go for a walk." she said, I looked up to meet her eyes. They were pleading and she held a look that made me give in.