Testimony of a Rock Star: Fame Chapter 1

Chapter 20

20. Voices Carry

JacindaLake Wylie, NC Present

I immersed myself into the overflowing bubbles around me. The smell of lavender floated in the air. I closed my eyes and leaned back against the tub. I shouldn’t have gone to The Shack today. The day would have been fine without me pushing for answers. I should have just let it be.

I closed my eyes, and I began to pray. I hadn’t in a while. I had prayed while I was on tour for my family and friends as I always did at night before I went to bed. I hadn’t meditated in prayer in a long time. I sat in silence as the thoughts went through my mind. How could I not be happy? I had my dreams finally answered. I had given my family and friends what they wanted. I somehow was still not happy, still alone. I thought by now I would be married with children, but I had chosen another path. I was confused, but like everything in my life God would reveal himself. He always had, that was something I could count on.

After my bath I dried my hair and found some sweats to put on. I then jumped in bed. The rain was still coming down outside my windows. I grabbed my remote to the TV. My TV couldn’t be seen unless I hit the button on the remote, and then it would rise out of the long wooden trunk that sat in front of my bed. When the TV locked into place, I began to flip through the channels. I was hoping a good movie would be on, something to fall asleep to. As I continued to look, I saw that the news was on, and I paused to watch.

Unexpectedly the headline at the bottom of the screen read “Bobby Badeau arrives in Charlotte.”

The picture showed his plane landing and Bobby coming out of the airport surrounded by cameras. I needed no more confusion in my life. I turned the TV off and rolled over to face the windows that overlooked the lake. I closed my eyes tightly and began to focus on my breathing, in and out. My body gave in to my wish to sleep off my nightmare and enter my dream world...

I was on the beach. My toes wiggled in the sand, and I was glad that I was there, but something was missing. I looked around to find myself alone. The day was overcast and there seemed to be a fog rolling in off the ocean. I stood for a moment and looked out over the ocean, and then began to walk down the shore.

I seemed to be looking for something, but I couldn’t remember what it was. As I walked, I looked down at the sand and ever so often I noticed there were words written in the sand, but before I could read them the water would sweep them away. I began to jog when I spotted the next scripted words in the sand, and again I was too slow and the water washed them away.

I looked down the beach and noticed figures ahead of me. It was a couple and a child. As I walked closer I almost felt odd watching them, like I was invading their moment of privacy. They all wore white cotton that flowed in the wind. The man was tall and even from where I stood I could tell he was very handsome. His hair was a crazy mixture of sandy brown and blonde that was long enough to blow in the wind. He was tan as any family would be that played along the beach.

The father, I suppose, chased the child playfully in and out of the wading water as it washed upon the shore. The child was a little girl. She had golden locks and already seemed to have olive tone skinned. She laughed as she played. The golden father picked up the golden child and kissed her and held her with what love a father would have for his little girl.

The mother watched and smiled, I thought. I couldn’t see her face because her back was to me. She matched perfectly with the rest of her family. Blonde locks blew in the wind and then she looked over her shoulder towards me. I was shocked. I stopped and didn’t go any further when I realized who the perfect family was.