Don't. Touch. Me. [Book One]

I-I Can't Anymore...

Here's yesterday's update...

Enjoy! ^_^

Lisa's POV

*September 4th 2014 11:34 a.m.*

I ran straight for the bathroom, pushed open the door and threw up. It has been like this for a few months now, and I feel awful. I've also been craving for super sweet foods, sometimes making Chresanto get up in the middle of the night to get me food. He says he doesn't mind, but from the grogginess in his voice and the bags under his eyes, I know he's lying. Along with the weird cravings, it looks like I've been gaining weight, which doesn't make sense, because Chres and I do it all the time. I know our relationship isn't the best, and it probably just gets worse and worse everyday, but he is the best I ever had.

I cleaned up the best I could and took a shower. I decided on just sweats and a hoodie, knowing I was too tired to go anywhere today. I looked off and noticed Chresanto was still sleep. He looked calm, something I wish he was all the time. Just yesterday, he went off on me because he found a letter in one of my boxes. He got mad because he saw Prince's name on it. I told him to stay out my stuff, and we got into a heated argument. Shit escalated, and we actually fought, which turned into sex. The sex wasn't bad, but I think he uses sex as an end to our arguements. I shook my head, not feeling like getting mad all over again and decided to get some work done for school.

I pulled out my laptop and typed away, as I heard him come downstairs.

"You doing work?"

"Mhm." Was my response, as he continued into the kitchen.

He pulled out a bottle of orange juice, took a big gulp and wiped his mouth. I heard him draw a heavy breath.

"I have an appointment later, so I'll be home late."

"But it's only Monday?" I questioned.

"There's just a lot of shit on my mind."

I looked up from my work, and watched him go upstairs. I don't know why, but something's telling me there's more to this therapy session. From all the shit he's put me through, begging to get to know more and more about him, he's open to a therapist. A complete stranger, but not me: that just doesn't sit right with me.

After working for ten minutes, I heard the stomping of his boots and his muscular frame stand over me. He kissed my forehead and grabbed his things, leaving me all alone. I shrugged and kept working until a whole hour had passed. My stomach began to growl, a sign that I haven't eaten all day. I closed my work, for now, and checked the fridge. There was nothing in there I wanted to eat, so I thought I could go out and get something. I knew I wanted some fries, badly. Knowing there was a McDonalds around the corner, I walked all the way there, ordered just two large fries and a sweet tea, and made my way back home. I shut and locked the door and stopped when I saw that the basement door was wide open. I don't know why, but it intrigued me. Still eating my fries, I walked down the dark, creaky staircase, searching for a lightswitch. I didn't find it until after I almost tripped over something. After pulling the string, I noticed it was some tube. I picked it up, not fully knowing what it was. It looked like it had some white residue on it and I got nervous. I placed it on this shelf and proceeded more into the room, where there was a table with the covering over it. My curiosity got the best of me and I started slowly walking towards it. Right before I could get to it, I had this sharp pain in my stomach, and I doubled over.

Running as fast as I could to the nearest bathroom, I had managed to make it to a toilet, feeling a massive headache. Once I was finished, I cleaned up the best I could and just fell to the floor. I don't know what's wrong with me, but I know it's something I'm not gonna like. I just hope I'm not pregant, I barely have a job. The only one supporting us is Chresanto, and I don't think a baby will better our rocky relationship. It's bad enough with his short temper and unexpected outrages. Besides, mentally I'm not ready for a baby. I want to create a stable environment before I have any kids whatsoever, and if that means I have to leave Chresanto and be on my own, then so be it.