An Imperfect Beauty and Her Beast

Secrets, Secrets Always Spill

A/N Well it has been a very busy week, but I survived. No school tmw so that means I can write some more. Woo! I hope this chapter makes someone throw their phone at the wall. Please Vote/Comment/Share!

David’s POV

 It was now way too early in the morning to be thinking, but here I was doing that exact thing. My eyes felt itchy and dry as I looked over at the clock. 4 A.M. Great.

I felt Giovanna shift next to me as she took a deep breath. Despite her earlier words of not needing to be watched over, she wanted company.

I was kinda pissed that she didn’t tell me that she met Melinda, and she knew it. I just thought that she could trust me enough to tell me. She even said earlier that she trusts me. Then when Melinda came by, shit broke loose in my thoughts. As if my head could get even busier.

After Melinda left and Josh said he had some stuff to do, I went to my room to write for a bit. I wasn’t thinking clearly, otherwise I wouldn’t have left Giovanna’s side. When it got darker out, I went back to check on her though. I felt this need to stay with her, but I knew that if I insisted on staying, she’d probably reassure me that she was okay. So I used reverse phycology. I wished her a goodnight and turned to leave when she nervously asked for me to stay. I remember letting out a relieving breath, grateful that my actions didn’t backfire. Even if it didn’t work, I would’ve waited outside her door to make sure she’d be safe. I’d be awake anyways

I’m still wondering what she dreamt of though. What could have triggered something that bad? Seeing her so broken down like that only made me want to protect her even more.

I only wish I could help her in someway. But she’s already told me that what I’m doing is the only thing I can do. When she was half asleep she mentioned not wanting me to be dragged into this. That she doesn’t want me to have her as a burden. But I want to be dragged into this. I want to be part of her world. And if that means seeing her at her lowest point, so be it. If only she saw me as more than a friend. I could kiss her when she’d get nervous. I could stare at her eyes if it didn’t sound as creepy as what it actually is. I would always be there for her without having to hold anything back. I could tell her over and over that I love her. But, I can’t just force my feelings onto her. That’s not cool at all. Would she be obligated to like me back? Things would get awkward between us, I wouldn’t be able to just pass it off as just nothing like the kiss. If I tell her, everything would be on the line.

Would she even stay?

I cringed at that question. All this time I’ve been living in fear that she’d leave me for something or someone else. Damn this insecurity. I wonder if she thinks about leaving. But she said before that she doesn’t miss her family as much anymore. And besides, I’ve got being the phantom on my side. Hopefully, I can get the story right. Or I guess, right in Matt and Giovanna’s point of views. Raoul could be anyone though. Daniel, Jesse, maybe even someone from her past that I’ve never really heard of. But, if it were him, wouldn’t I have heard of him? My brain was running in circles, second guessing my conclusions. And damn, it is annoying. But, then there’s my curse. Could she actually want me with that on top of my messy life? God, I sound so... unlike myself. These past years in here have changed me. But I’m glad they did. For most of my life it was like I was trying to discover myself in the worst ways possible. But I always wonder, if I had acted different, would my family still be alive?

No, they wouldn’t

That was my answer every time. They died in a car accident to the doctor’s. They were going for an ultrasound. They asked me to go, should I have gone? Could I have somehow prevented the accident? Or would I have died with them? I have to stop questioning myself. If I was with them, I would probably be dead. The car was totally wrecked, I know I wouldn’t have survived. And now that I am alive, I can’t just give it up. I have purpose.