Logan stared at Rory for a moment. He was surprised by her words, but couldn't disagree. He had been heartbroken when she had refused to marry him. It had taken him a long time to come to terms with her refusal. "Rory, that was a long time ago." He tried to shrug it off.
"Ten years, yes. But can you honestly tell me that I didn't hurt you? Because it hurt me terribly." Rory insisted.
Logan sighed and ran his hands over his face. He sank back into his chair and nodded for Rory to sit as well. Rory sat and waited for him to speak.
"Honestly, yes. I was devastated. But once I had time to get past the hurt, I did understand why you said no. Agreeing to marry me then, it would have had huge impact on your career. You would have been saddled with the Huntzburger name which would have both opened and closed doors for you. Regardless of whether you or not we had waited for the wedding, or if you kept your maiden name." Logan said.
"Yes, but that was all about me. My career, my goals, my needs. I didn't think about you. We could have found a way to make it work. I should have realized that you were ready for a commitment and I know that you didn't come to that decision lightly. " Rory disagreed.
"Of course you were thinking about yourself! You were 22! I was thinking about myself too. I was so worried that we would grow apart, busy with our own lives, that I threw our relationship away. That's what the problem was. We were too young to understand what it takes for a relationship between equals at the time. Or too sheltered or immature. Whatever you want to call it." Logan insisted.
"It's all water under the bridge now. I said no, and broke your heart. I broke my own in the process." Rory shrugged. "The only reason I bought it up was to explain why I felt that it wasn't my place to ask for more."
Logan nodded and sighed. "I wish we had actually talked about our past when we ran into each other in Hamburg. We could have avoided a lot of misery."
Rory agreed. "Yeah. I guess so. Funny thing is,
Luke said something to me a few days ago and it was a lightbulb moment for me. I had always kinda compared you to my dad, based on a bunch of surface similarities. But Luke pointed out how you much you are really like my mom."
Logan chuckled. "I'm like Lorelie? Why do you say that?"
"You are both very emotional people. You are both very daring and adventurous. I'm not like you two. I'm cautious and need to have a plan and don't adjust easily to the unexpected." Rory elaborated.
"You're adventurous!" Logan exclaimed.
"No, not really." Rory shook her head. "I can be convinced to join in on an adventure, but I don't seek it out."
Logan sat back and thought about what she had said. He had always thought of his adventures with Rory as being the two of them, but she had a point. He was the instigator, even though she willingly went along with his ideas.
"So, if I'm like your mom, who are you like?" He asked.
"Luke. He's steady and a planner like me. I spent a lot of time with him growing up, he really was my father figure, I guess. My dad is more like you and mom. Not as reliable as you two, a bit more self centered. I guess I get that from him." Rory mused.
"Okay. I'm not sure if I completely agree with you, but what does that mean now? Where do we go from here?" Logan asked.
Rory smiled. "I'm all in. It's up to you now. We go as fast or as slowly as you feel comfortable."
Logan nodded, but he remained pensive. "I'm not sure how to move forward. We have a baby to consider now. What happens if we try and fail? How do we raise the baby then?"
Rory swallowed hard. She felt a lump in her throat. This was what she had been afraid of, that Logan wouldn't want to try. "So we put a pin in our relationship for now. But I'm serious, when you are ready to revisit the topic, I'm all in. I'm just going to give you the time you need."
Logan stared at Rory. He was surprised and oddly disappointed that she was willing to settle for less then everything. But he knew that she was just giving him the opportunity to figure it out for himself. The only problem was he didn't know what he wanted.
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Note - sorry for the long delay. I struggled with this chapter a lot. It kept going differently than I wanted the story to go and after rewriting it several times, I've decided to go with it where it insists to go. If this seems a little disjointed from the previous chapters, it does to me as well. But I can't force it where it doesn't want to go!
