Deserving | ✔

Chapter 31

Recap: Phillip was in a car crash/attack with Tamara. He sends Trisha to drive Tamara to his dad for her safety. JP propositions him to smoke a joint and he accepts.

*Back to Phillip's POV*

I see it. I see her.

My Juliet, my Steph, walking towards me. I smile and offer my hand to her, asking her to sit on my lap.

She does so, as she wraps an arm around my neck and fondles my hair with the other. I rest my hand on her thighs and breathe in her scent, her unexplainable sweet aroma that makes me feel calm and excited at the same time. I always am at a loss of word to explain or compare her scent. It's just her. The scent is Steph. Nothing else can be used to explain it.

She leans into my ear and says, "You need to wake up, Phillip."

"What? No! I am awake!" I deny her.

"Phil, your friends need you right now. You need yourself to be in reality right now. Go, please..." She whispers and places a kiss near the back of my ear.

And then I feel the back of my pants vibrating. It's a strange sensation.

I suddenly jerk awake from the dream as I feel my phone vibrating inside my back pocket.

I get up from the couch and suddenly feel dizzy as my lower body plops back down due to their wobbliness.

What happened to me?

I take my phone while sitting and see JP on the caller ID. But before I could answer him, my phone goes black. Dead.

Wait up, world. I feel a little too dizzy and lightheaded to grasp the issues of the surroundings. I try to get up and this time I am a little successful. I take small steps to the kitchen and God, I feel like I'm lifting a truck with my legs as I walk.

Successfully, I reach the kitchen. After running the tap on and splashing some water on my face, I put on a pot of coffee and wait for it to brew.

Hold on. There's something missing here... I'm definitely not thinking of something.

What happened to me?

I focus on the last thing I remember.

JP's words enter my mind. "You're a good guy, Phillip."

Where is he now if he was here before I blanked out?

I turn to the living room to see a duffel bag. I remember it being his duffel bag full of the crack I ordered to get him here. I walk over to the bag and lift it to see a piece of paper under it.

I pick it up and it reads:

'U wer stil out wen I woke up. Had a gr8 tim yst n8. Cal me wen u wake up. - JP

P.S. U r a mean smoker. Lol.'

Smoker? Me? An image of a big ass joint enters my mind.

My mind trails back to the image of JP smoking it and passing it to me. Shit. Shit! Shit!

I smoked a joint?

I smoked a joint that wore me out throughout the night?!

I glance at the clock above the TV. It reads 1 PM. Oh, so the joint kept me down for almost a day?

I feel disgusting. Why? Why did I do it? Why in hell did I agree to do something that Stephanie would've never forgiven me for?

I plop down on the couch and press my face into my arms as I contemplate the flaws of my choice. My fingers flow down my face and I smell it. I smell the remnants of the joint in between my fingers.