Painless➰Sidemen AU✔️

1.3

Shallows- Daughter
"M-my f-father?" I spoke in a low voice, in a trance with the large A4 envelope in front of me. As soon as I came back she sat me down and handed it to me.
"Yeah, your mum told me to give it to you when you were old enough to understand." She spoke softly, comfortingly placing a warm hand on my forearm. "I would have gave it to you sooner but I knew that she would have wanted me to wait." She offered a light smile.
"Thank you, Mary, for everything" I whispered once more, gliding my thumb over the textured brown envelope.
"You're welcome Violet, I have to get back to the shop, I'll leave you to it" She spoke in a delicate voice also, rubbing up and down my arm, comfortingly before standing up and leaving.
I dauntingly stared at the envelope, that rested on my lap before gently lifting it up and opening it slowly, still unsure if I wanted to know my father or not. He abandoned me before I was born, left me when I needed him here. I looked down at the piece of A4 paper and a couple of pictures that lay in my grip. I scanned over the letter and instantly recognised it a my mum's from the many birthday cards and pictures I kept.

My dearest Violet,
I expect when you read this I will have been gone for quite some time. I'm writing this because you have most likely never met your father, I'm sorry I denied you of that for all of your life. So let me explain.
I met your dad in a bar in London, when I lived there, and I got his number. I fell in love, but he didn't love me. We were talking for a few months we were at my flat and I'll spear you the rest of the details. Before you were born, he left and he later told me that he was married and already had a family of his own. I told him to stay out of our lives and moved to the village where you grew up. He's out there somewhere, if you want to find him you can and I will support you decision from up here fully.
His name is William Bradley and he lived in London. I also put on a photo of him and I together. If you look for him I hope you find him.
I hope you're still the sweet smiley girl I knew before I left. Never let them break you honey
Goodbye my dear,
Mum x.
"William Bradley" I muttered to myself, gazing at the image of my mother staring contently into a bearded man, their arms firmly wrapped around each other. I had his thick dark brown hair, mum's hair was thin and blonde.
I brushed my thumb over the photo and smiled. It was as though I now had a mission in life. To find my Father, my dad, half of me. I still hadn't quite sinked in when I looked at the other picture of my dad kissing the small bump on my mum's stomach, that I assumed was me.
I wasn't mad at Mum, not like I thought I'd be if I found out she kept him away from me, I understand why she wanted me to know when I was older. If I found out when I was younger, I would have been sad and angry. I wouldn't have understood why she kept me away: to shelter me from the feeling of abandoned and pain of knowing I was a mistake. Of course the pain is there, but I can deal with it.
I grabbed my bag and shoved the contents inside, closing it up and slinging the bag over my shoulders.
It was almost seven and I knew that the bus came then, so I jogged down the stairs and bid goodbye to Mary.