Disaster • Arctic Monkeys Fanfiction

[fifty]

Alex's POV

"Give me the phone," the man said, pushing the gun harder into my temple.  "And your wallet."

"Alright, j-just calm down," I stammered, handing over my phone.  It was still vibrating with Indi's name across the screen.  

My heart was pounding.  Tonight was not a good night to die. Indi would be proper pissed at me if every one of her future birthdays were overshadowed by the anniversary of Alex Turner's death.

And I just really, really did not want to die.

I gave the man my wallet and the pressure of the gun on my temple eased a bit.  He flipped it open and examined inside.

"What the fuck is this?" he asked, pulling out my money.

"I dunno, like 50 Quid?"

He looked at me blankly.

"Oh," I said, realizing he'd probably never seen English money in his life.  "I'm not carrying any American money."

The gun pressed hard against my temple again.  "I ain't gonna use no British money."

"My bank cards," I said quickly.  "They're loaded.  They can be used anywhere."  

I wasn't exactly sure if that was true or not, but I was desperate.  

"They better be," he said, squinting down at my drivers license.  "Alex Turner."

He paused for what felt like an eternity before looking up at me, surprise replacing his malicious demeanor.  "Hold up.  You're not the Alex Turner, are you?"

"Er..."

"You're that guy from that band?  My bitch was watching you on Letterman last night."

"Uh, yeah," I said.  "That's me."

"No shit," he said.  "This alley is so dark I couldn't see you."

He pulled my phone out and shone the light on my face.

"Well fuck, it really is you!"

My mugger was a fan.  Could this night get any more bloody strange?

"I ain't never listened to much of your stuff, but I like that song you sang last night.  What was it? Do I know, or something?"

"Do I Wanna Know," I corrected him.

"That's it," he said, slapping me on the arm. "Yeah. You know, I usually listen to Insane Clown Posey, and don't fuck with that alternative rock bullshit, but I like ya'll.  You're good."

"Thanks mate," I said.  "But, uh, would you mind putting the gun down?"

"Oh shit," he laughed, pulling it down.  "My bad.  I mean, I was going to kill you.  Before I knew who you were."

I didn't know what to say to that.  What could I say? But I didn't even get the chance to think about it, because a voice yelled my name before I could.  

And it wasn't just any voice.  It was Indi's.

Both my mugger and I looked up at the mouth of the alley to see her running toward us, the sound of her heels smacking against the concrete echoed through the alley.

"Police!" she yelled, which caused my mugger to laugh so hard that he had to lean up against me to stable himself.  

"Welp," he said through laughs.  "I guess that's my cue.  It was nice meeting you."