Mieko's journal

Dec 22, 27

Sunday Dec 22. 

My mom still isn't back. Thats 9 days. She's usually never gone this long.

What if she's gone for good. She probably ran away so she does'nt have to deal with me. I'd run away to if I was her. I can envision it now. 

She saw a picture of me & just start thinking about how much she can't stand me. Then she went to "take a walk" only to realize that she can keep walking. She doesn't have to turn back. 

I'm almost 18. She probably figures that I can take care of myself now. Some random guys probably picked her up. She just got out wherever he was going & kept walking until someone else picks her up.

Maybe she'll get out of the country. Go back packing across Europe. Or something along those lines. I hope she's happy wherever she is. 

I'm gonna go look for a job & an apartment. I won't have enough money to keep this house. I should probably start packing my things & figuring out what I want to keep. 

~Meiko

Friday Dec 27. 

She's still not back.

For 5 days now, I've woken up every morning & had a panic attack when I realize she's not back. It's a horrible way to start the day. I stayed awake almost all of Christmas convinced that she'd be back. I sat by the door with her present in my hands until I fell asleep complelty exhausted. No matter how much I sleep I wake up even more tired.

This is one of the times where I just pray that I will die. I haven't been eating anything but crackers & I think I've been drinking water but I honestly can't remember.

Maybe I'll die from dehydration. 

Writing this has completely drained my energy. I'm gonna go now.

~Meiko 

(AHHHH I have 86 read on this story!!!!!!!!!! That's awesome. Thanks so so so so much for reading who ever you may be.)