Forever Lost

16

Robin

Two days. That's how long I've been sitting next to her. My eyes were heavy as I had only fallen asleep once, and it was on accident. Everyone made their rounds every few hours but I was the only one who stayed with her the entirety of the time. Raven has changed her clothes two times and we've made sure to keep her as comfortable as we can. Every so often one of her fingers would twitch or her forehead would scrunch as if she was thinking hard about something, but that was all; nothing more. Her eyes were still glued shut and her hand was still limp in my own.
"Star, I know you probably can't hear me and you need your rest, but I miss you, I miss you so much! I need you to come back to me, come back to me baby."
It was another desperate attempt from me to get through to her.
My fingers brushed her hair from her face and my hand rested on her cheek. Her bruises were just now starting to turn green as they started to slowly heal and her wrist looked ten times better now that we had it in a cast and it was elevated with ice. Unfortunately, it looked as though the J on her wrist was going to scar. She will have to see that horrific reminder of what he put her through for the rest of her life and there's nothing I can do to take it away.
My eyes were starting to droop shut now and I was forcing myself to try and stay awake in case she were to wake up; although it seemed as though she would never regain consciousness again.
I let out a sigh and stared down at my hand that held hers as tight as it could.
A groan grasped my attention and I eagerly looked up at her face as her breathing sped up.
"Star, Starfire?"

Starfire

"Starfire?"
I struggled to open my cramped eyes so that I could see the eyes that I loved so much. I just need to see him, just to confirm that I really am home and that i am truly safe again.
My body ached everywhere and I was curious to find out how long I have been asleep. I could have been asleep for weeks and I wouldn't have known, everything has been a blur. I've been in and out of consciousness this whole time, except when I am awake, I have been unable to open my eyes.
"Come on baby, wake up please!"
Robin's voice was pleading and I was trying so hard to fulfill his wish. With one last push of adrenaline, my green eyes opened to see his beautiful blue eyes looking down at me. Tears immediately filled them and I groaned in pain when he pulled me to his chest for a hug.
When he heard that I was in pain, he pulled away and gave me an apologetic smile in return.
"Sorry, I guess I should have realized that a hug wasn't the best thing for you right now." His long fingers raked through his greasy black hair while a nervous yet joyful laugh fell from his chapped lips. How long has he been with me?
"Robin, how long have I been asleep?"
He didn't even have to check his watch to tell me; two days, twelve hours, and fifty minutes. My heart clenched as I was reminded of how much he cared for me and my non broken hand reached up to caress his left cheek. He immediately sighed and leaned into it. The underside of my nails held so much dirt that it looked like I had been digging for treasure with my hands. I flipped my hand to examine the extent of how dirty I was when I saw it. The scab-covered J that was engraved into my skin. When I saw it, something weird happened and I found myself back in that terrible white room where they took the only thing that made me a part of the Titans away; my powers. The Jokers pale face and terrifying laugh took over my thoughts and I involuntarily jumped when Robin tapped my arm. He looked hurt that I would flinch away from him, and I felt bad but I couldn't help it. His gloved fingers felt like... they felt like the Joker's.
He opened his mouth but stopped when the others walked in. My eyes widened and a small grin took over at the sight of my friends.
"Star!"
BeastBoy ran over to me and attempted to hug me, but I had to push him away due to the pain. "Sorry, I just really missed you."
"I missed you too BeastBoy."
He just smiled before allowing Cyborg to walk over to me.
Instead of hugging me, he simply stuck his arm out for me to shake his hand. I did and when our skin touched, part of me felt like it woke up again, a part of me that was only complete when I was with my friends.
"It's good to have you back Star, we missed you, a lot."
I just smiled before Raven silently made her way to my side.
"Can I have a word you guys?"
They all just nodded and left us alone.
I felt awkward for some reason, maybe because if I would have just listened to her I wouldn't have been taken.
"I'm sorry."
She seemed to be taken aback by my apology and her eyes softened into a sympathetic stare into my own.
"No, I'm sorry. I should have explained myself before treating you like a prisoner, it wasn't fair for you."
Our eyes met and I used what little strength I had to pull her to me so we could have a proper hello. I sighed as I held my sister close to me but it was too soon when I had to let her go so I could breathe properly again.
"I believe that the both of us are at fault, but I forgive you Raven."
She just smiled, grasping my hand in hers for just a moment before leaving me alone in the room. I was only alone, however, for a few seconds before Robin came back in.
"How about we go clean you up yeah?"
I just nodded my head and we worked in tandem to remove all of the cords from my limbs. Everything hurt and when I attempted to stand, Robin barely caught me before I landed on the hard floor. My legs wobbled as I tried to walk to my room, but they soon gave out and we resorted to Robin simply carrying me the rest of the distance. When my door opened and I was met with my dark and desolate room that I hadn't seen in weeks, I couldn't help the small, joyful tears that filled my eyes.
"Silkie!"
Silkie ran as fast as he could to Robin's feet and crawled up the side of his body so he was sitting in my lap. His plump tongue covered my face and I laughed as Robin's face cringed at the sliminess. "Ok, now you really need to get clean."
Another giggle escaped and it almost felt foreign to feel slight happiness again. When we walked into my small bathroom, Silkie immediately left the room, he has always hated bathing. Robin gently sat me on the lid of my toilet and started the bath water. While he was concentrating on getting the water to the right temperature, I decided to try and take my shirt off. My joints ached and my shoulders popped as I lifted the loose material over my head. When I had finally rid myself of my shirt, I gasped when I looked down at the body below me. Bruises melded together in some spots while several deep gashes were stitched together and my stomach was sunken in. It was the same situation when I took off my shorts. Now that I saw my body, I realized how sickly I looked. My skin seemed to be hanging on to stiff bones and it was hard to find any skin clear of a cut or bruise. When I finally looked back up, Robin was looking at my injuries with a sad and angry face. Instinctively, my arms attempted to cover as much of my body as possible, I didn't want him to see me like this; weak and unhealthy. He grabbed my hands just as I figured he would and kissed each of my cut-up knuckles.
"Don't hide Star, I still think you're just as beautiful as the day I lost you."
I slowly let my arms wrap around his shoulders and pulled his strong body to mine. Our lips met and something deep inside me seemed to wake up. Something seemed to grasp on to the little sign of a happy life that was in front of me and hold it as close to my heart as possible.
Things will never be the same as they were before, but at least a part of my previous life hasn't changed one bit.