My eyes widened when she said that. Wait, how did she know? How did she find out? Oh... I was out in the hallways, right outside her room. She obviously was able to hear me.
"N-Nicole, I can explain," I managed to stutter out a few words. I could barely look at Nicole, because her eyes would break my heart. They were full of so much sadness, and tears were brimming.
"No need to..." she muttered, "So, I guess you were right. You do hate me."
"No!" I protested, "I love you, Nicole! I-I was drunk-"
"Then, why did you get drunk? You knew that you would act badly, so why even take the risk?" Nicole yelled. I couldn't find the right words to tell her. I didn't have an answer. I never learn, do I? It's happened before, but I keep doing it, hoping that it will help me somehow. It never does, so why do I keep trying?
"Why don't you just tell me what happened the night you decided to drink?" Nicole challenged. Okay, it's time to clear everything up. I can't keep hiding everything. I need to be honest this time. I have to stop hiding.
"I will admit that I didn't believe you. I was so stressed out... you were always crying, and I couldn't help you. If I don't see something, then I don't believe in it. I was so sick of all the stress, so I decided to go out to a club. It was a dumb decision, I knew that already. Well, I went there and got really drunk. This one girl started talking to me. Before I knew it, we were making out, and then we went and got a hotel room... and, um, we did it."
I finished and looked over at Nicole. Her face was hidden in her hands. I could hear her sobbing, and I felt stabs of guilt in my heart. They hurt so bad, and wouldn't go away. What have I done?
"N-Nicole... I-I'm sorry," I whispered. She shook her head, "Do you even know how many times I've heard that from you? I-I'm just so sick of it all! Is anything true anymore? You told me that you couldn't trust me, but you are the liar here. I-I don't even know who you are anymore. Maybe I should've allowed him to win..."
"No, Nicole," Louis scolded, "We can't have you going to kill yourself!"
"Why do you even care, Louis?" Nicole yelled. Louis was shocked by her change in tone. I saw tears running down Nicole's cheeks, "No one cares! No one believed me! All I feel is loneliness... a-and I don't even know what to live for anymore."
"Nicole, I'm sor-" I began, but she interrupted, "Niall, just go!" she yelled at me, "We were a mistake from the beginning! We were always messed up! Why do we even try anymore? Just go, all of you!"
Some nurses had arrived, when they heard all the commotion. We were forced to leave. The door was closed behind us, but I could still hear Nicole's loud yelling and choked sobs. What have I done?
*
*Nicole's P.O.V.*
Today is my last day in the hospital. The doctors have tried fixing my mental shape, but that's impossible. I'm so broken, that I'm unfixable. I can't stand life anymore. I've been threatening to kill myself a lot, but the doctor's just talk to me, and give me more pills. I hate everything.
"Nicole, today you're allowed to go home," the doctor told me. I didn't say anything. I've gotten into a habit of ignoring them. The doctor sighed, "Nicole, I have some bad news for you," that made me pay attention, "You aren't mentally stable enough to take care of children," he said, "Until your mental condition improves, you won't be allowed to take care of your kids."
My eyes widened, "What?" I exclaimed, "No, I have to be able to see my kids! I can't let them grow up without me! I have to be able to see them. I don't want to be the kind of mother who never sees there kids!"
