black bird, raven reyes

49. brain damage

Abby had just gotten the bullet out of Eden's leg, and was currently resting.

Raven felt as if she was flying, due to her 'floating' in the air. Minutes passed until Abby noticed Raven seizing. "Okay, get her on her side. Now." Abby said to Jackson, getting Raven on her side.
—
"Raven." Abby said, once she woke up.

"Abby something happened."

"Raven, you had a seizure. We need to do a brain scan. Jackson, she's awake."

"Seizure?" Abby nodded. "No. No." Raven stood up, nearly falling over. "It was like my brain was operating with such intensity. It was so real. Zero-g with no suit." Raven lets out a sigh once she sees their facial expression. "I'm not crazy."

"No. No one thinks you are."

"Weightlessness. Abby, what happened when you tried to get the Nightblood protein to bond with Luna's DNA?"

"The structure of the RNA fell apart.  Why?"

"Abby, she just had a seizure."

"Because I think I know why Becca couldn't make it work in this lab. Computer, show me prototype Nightblood RNA binding in a zero-g environment."

"Stimulation complete." The computer said.

"Your hallucination told you this?" Abby asked, and Raven nodded.

"When I imagined I was weightless, my neurons must have been firing faster than my conscious mind could process."

"Communicating through your subconscious." Raven nodded. "How do we stimulate zero gravity in a laboratory environment?"

"We can't. It's impossible. It's impossible on Earth. Alie said that Becca went to space looking for a more secure environment to get away from her, but I don't think that was the reason at all. I think she went to space to make nightblood."

"Raven, how does that help us? It's not as though we can go back into space."

"Wanna bet? Computer, open interior blasts and launch doors."
—
"I've never seen anything like it. She's using a huge percentage of her brain." Abby said.

"There's a flight stimulator built into the rockets software. Get this thing off me so I can strap in and give it a whirl."

"Not yet, Raven. Keep doing what you're doing." Abby and Jackson talked about something Raven couldn't make out. "There's no fuel in the tank, but there's plenty of hydrazine back in Arkadia, we can have it here in a day."

"Okay Raven. I need you to slow down."

"You're kidding me, right? Abby, we have a rocket. We go to space and make nightblood. It's a two-seater by the way. Sound like a plan?"

"Listen to me. Heightened mental ability, hallucinations, euphoria, headaches, it's all connected. Alie warned you that the EMP would cause brain damage."

"Jasper was right. That's why no one else got an upgrade." Raven said.

"What are you talking about?"

"For everyone else, Clarke pulled the master kill switch. It's like shutting down a program the right way. When the EMP fried my chip, it was more like fitting the power from the OS while the ram was still full. Part of Alie's code is still in my head. That's why I know things I was never taught. Becca's mind was in that code."

"That's why you knew where the rocket was."

"Yes, and now I need to learn how to fly this thing."

"Wait, Raven your brain scan showed evidence of a stroke. I'm afraid if you keep pushing like this, it's just going to make things worse."

"I've been through worse."

"Not worse than this. Raven, it could kill you."

"Could or will? So, what, I survive long enough for everyone else to die? I can't do that, Abby. Even if it costs me my life, you have to let me go."

"What about Eden?" Raven closed her eyes at the thought of her. "She'll be okay. She's strong."

"You made Clarke take an innocent person off of the list to put her on the list. You can't live without her. She's all you have, and vice Versa. You can't leave her without you. She loves you, and need you, Raven." Abby knew she was right.

"Why haven't you had any symptoms?" Raven asked, changing the subject. "They used the EMP on you too."

"Because we both know that brain trauma can induce entirely different symptoms in different people."

"Still, Abby, we have to scan your brain too."

"I'll let you know if I have any headaches, okay?"
—