I'm not safe here (Wroetoshaw/Minishaw)

Ch. 44

"Harry, baby, It's gonna be OK, I'm here for you" Simon whispered as he stroked over Harry's cheek

"No, it's not gonna be OK" Harry just cried, he had done nothing but cry since he woke up after he had fainted out on the street after they had taken Alfie's body away. 

"I know it's hard, It's hard for us to, but this is not your fault in any way, you have to know that, I don't blame you for being upset either, this was a very horrific thing to see, and I don't expect you to be OK right now" Simon told him as he was just trying to be there for his boyfriend who was in distress. 

"I just can't stop thinking about it, I can't stop seeing it, every time that I close my eyes" Harry cried out as he buried himself in Simon's arms. 

"I know baby, I know" Simon just whispered to him as he stroked over his back and trough his hair, this was to much for him and Simon knew that, he did not need this, not after everything that he had already gone through with Alfie. 

"I need to talk to his mom"

"no you don't"

"I need to apologize to her, I need to say I'm sorry, I ruined his life, and there life, I ruin everything" Harry sobbed out

"no, stop torturing yourself Harry, you need to stop thinking about everyone else and focus on you, you need to be OK yourself before you start trying to hand out apologize's that you don't need to. Alfie was the one that abused you, mentally and physically, he was the one that stabbed me and tried to basically kidnap you the day after your surgery, the court put him in jail for all off that and none off it is on you, what he chose to do is not on you, and don't you dare put in on yourself" Simon told him as he just held him close, trying to put some sense into his boyfriend, but Simon knew that it would not work strait away, Harry was to far gone in his self hate, it would take some time to help him fill up the hole that he had made. 

"I don't know how to stop thinking" Harry cried out

"I'm going to make a call to your doctor and see if I can have some over the counter sleeping pills, you need to sleep, I will talk to the police and make an appointment for tomorrow afternoon, you need to rest"

"thank you Si, I don't know what I did to deserve you, and for you to put up with all my shit" 

"hey, don't start that OK, you deserve the world, and that is what I will give to you, now try to get some rest, I will send Vikk in here while I'm on the phone OK" Simon said as he kissed Harry and then he made him lay down and put the blanket over him

"try to sleep, I love you"

"I love you to" Harry whispered before Simon walked out off the room, letting out a huge sigh as he came into the hallway, he ran down to the kitchen before he himself broke down, he had to be strong for Harry, but who would be strong for him, looking at your boyfriend in so much pain, and someone shooting themselves was not easy for him, and just an hour ago his boyfriend had a gun aimed at his head.