I'm not safe here (Wroetoshaw/Minishaw)

Ch. 45

Alfie's funeral 

"Harry, sweetheart, are you sure you want to go?" Simon asked as Harry was just sitting on his bed, he was just staring at his suit and tears were running down his cheeks silently, he was having a really hard time with this, he was not sleeping, he was not eating, and Simon thought that going to Alfie's funeral would be the worst thing that he could do to himself, but Harry wanted to. 

"I need to do this"

"are you sure?"

"yeah, I need to say goodbye, even after everything that he put me through, I still need to go and say goodbye, I think I need this to get over what happened"

"babe, he shot himself, right in front off you, no one expects you to be fine"

"I'm doing OK"

"no you are not, I sleep at your side every single night, I know how many times a night you jolt up, or cry out in fear, I can hear you" Simon said as he took Harry's hands into his own

"still, I need to close this chapter for good, I know I need some help, some professional help, and I will, just let me do this"

"OK, but I'm going with you, there is no way in hell that I'm going to let you go there alone"

"thank you Simon, that really means a lot to me" Harry said as Simon leaned in and kissed him lightly, then they both got dressed and when they came downstairs and were going to go, the rest off the Sidemen were there waiting for them, all dressed up and ready to go

"are you all going to?" Harry whispered

"yeah, you need support" JJ smiled as he hugged Harry

"thanks guys" Harry whispered as he hugged them all, this was not going to be easy, and Harry knew that, and the guys knew that as well. 

~~~

The service was lovely, Harry and the rest off the Sidemen sat at the back, hoping not to draw any attention to themselves as they were not really sure if they were wanted, Alfie's family was all there, and Harry did not know if they blamed him for everything that had gone down, or not, and as he had meet most off his close family members before, he was sure that someone would recognize him and give him a hard time. 

"Harry, just breath slowly, take slow deep breaths" Simon told him as he could hear Harry's irregular breathing. The casket was now going to be taken to the cemetery and buried, but on the way out off there Alfie's mom noticed Harry and looked him over, they both looked to be in the same shape, red puffy eyes and tears on there cheeks. 

"Harry"

"Mrs Deyes"

"can we talk for a minute outside?" she asked in a calm voice and Harry just nodded and followed her, Simon was unsure about all off this, but Harry told him that it was OK, he could handle this, it was the least he could do for her, after everything that he had taken away from the family. 

"I'm so sorry that he did this in front off you, you did not deserve this at all"

"I'm sorry that I ruined him, I never wanted this to happen, I'm so sorry" Harry cried 

"don't beat yourself up sweetheart, you had no control over any off this, I don't blame you at all"

"you don't? why?"

"his choices are not on you, and you can't take responsibility for them, you just need to keep going and try to not let this affect you to much, he was my son and I loved him very, very much, but I know he did you wrong and he hurt you deeply, and he has made your life very hard, but none off it is your fault, just remember that, OK" she told him and Harry just nodded before he went in for a hug, a hug that lasted for a long time. 

"try to have a wonderful life, you deserve it" she then tells Harry 

"thank you, and I'm so sorry for your loss" Harry said back

"thank you sweetheart" Mrs. Deyes smiled and walked off, and Simon came to replace her, he went strait in for a hug.

"don't worry about a thing, you are safe now" 

This is the end, I hope you all enjoyed this little story! 

Thank you for sticking with me through this book, much love <3 

I'm also doing a new Minishaw story called Right here, check it out if you have not already, and also check out my Wroetoshaw one shot book :)