A False Sense of Security

Chapter 32

I dive into the cold salty water. I open my eyes, which start to sting for a second but I get used to it.

I swim and swim deeper into the ocean.

Free from responsibilities.

Free from stress.

Free from lies

Free from sound.

Free from everything.

I've been swimming here since I was 10.

My mom would bring me and my brothers over when she couldn't find a babysitter.

Bruce was happy to help...after the first couple of times.

I wondered off a lot when he babysat us. I found this place the fourth time I came here. I jumped right in and almost drowned. I finally resurfaced and discovered what I needed to do in order to not die.

I began collecting different things under the water that I thought were interesting and researched them after. I found some very beautiful things down here. Like seashells, pearls, gems, and many other unusual things. I use them for my artworks, but I also just collect them and store them away.

I've been swimming for twenty minutes, before I decide its best that I resurface, so I don't drown. I can hold my breathe for a very long time when I'm swimming. I've learned how to from years of wanting to stay under the water forever.

When my head reaches the surface of the water I slowly lift my head from the water. I look around I'm about 10 meters away from the cliff I jumped off and 20 meters from the shore.

I start to descend back into the water, but then I remember something.

I was supposed to meet with Koda. SHIT.

I start swimming as fast as I can to the shore. I make it to the shallow end and start running. I start making my way to the forest.

I'll just call Koda and tell him where I-. Where's my phone?

Wait.

I jumped into the ocean.

With my phone.

Fuck.

Now he is gonna be even more worried. Great.

I start to run through the forest back to my house. Thankfully I know this forest like the back of my hand. Trees pass me as I run. I hear sticks breaking and leaves crunching beneath my feet. Animals scurry away from me scared.

The sun is setting.

I'm drenched.

Not good.

I start coughing and shivering from the cold wind whipping past me as I run. The water in my hair not drying at all.

I trip over a fallen tree and come crashing to the ground. My leg starts throbbing. I carefully get up and limp for awhile.

The throbbing lessens until it's gone. I start running, again, but this time I am more careful of my surroundings.

I can see the other side of the forest is getting closer and closer. I start to walk the rest of the way.

The sun has gone down and it's officially night.

I pass through the gardens and stop when I get to the bench. I look around diligently, but I can't find my phone. I hope I didn't lose it in the ocean.

I give up my search and continue to walk back to the house.

I finally make it back to Bruce's backyard and I walk through the backdoor.

I hear commotion in the kitchen. I walk through the doorway and find My brothers, Kacie, Tana, and him.

They all see me, my hair and clothes drenched, and their facial expressions turn from concern to shock.

"What happened?" Tana asks shocked, breaking.

"I went for a swim," I mumbled.

"Where were you?" Koda starts to interrogate me. "Why did I find your phone on the ground? How come you've been gone for so long?"

Thank God. He has my phone.

"I was at the cliff. I dropped my phone. I lost track of time. Sorry for worrying you guys." I explain. "Can I have my phone?"

He grabs my phone from the middle of the table and hands it to me. I smile. He looks mad. I sigh.

"How did you drop your phone?" Rafe asks.

"I was chasing after a deer," I answer. "It actually led me to the cliff. I was running through the backyard and into the forest after it. And don't ask me why, because I honestly don't know."

Everyone becomes silent. They all look at me as if I was some alien. I start to feel self conscious and look down at my feet.

"I should probably take a shower before I get pneumonia." I say as an excuse to get out of this awkward situation and walk away.

"She was chasing after a deer?" I heard Kacie question as I start to walk away. I stop.

"She hasn't been all there lately," Tana states.

"What are you trying to say?" Koda asks.

"What I'm implying is that maybe Kiara needs more help then we thought," Tana explains.

"What? So your suggesting we bring her to a mental hospital?" Rafe interjects.

"If it will help her, yeah, I guess I am," Tana says.

I don't want to hear anymore. I run up the stairs and lock myself in my bathroom.

I can't take this. I can't continue to listen to people telling me I'm not alright. I know I'm not alright. I need to end this.

I grab a hairbrush and throw it hard at my mirror. It shatters and glass pieces fall on the sink. I grab one press it hard into my skin.

I start with my upper arms and cut until I reach my wrists I press deep into my veins.

My blood is everywhere.

I feel people banging on the door on my back. I can hear faint yelling and screaming. My vision becomes blurry and my body starts to tingle.

Is this it?

Is this the end?

Will I finally be free?

A huge smile spreads across my face as I feel my body begin to numb. My eyes flutter closed. And I can't remember anything after that.