Let's Play a Game

Chapter 19: I Was Fine

Word Count:1205

Julian stands up and slips his hand in mine. "You look good" he studies my face, briefly I wonder if he could recognize me. "Come on, we can go watch a movie down stairs"

We sit down on the couch. I lay my legs across his. Julian has his arm wrapped around me pulling me against him, I leaned my head against his warm chest. He didn't seem to mind the fact my hair was still wet.

Julian reaches for the remote and turns it on. He scrolls through the different movies and tv shows. Finally we settle on some Adam Sandler movie.

We stay silent for the first few minutes of the movie. Finally, Julian breaks the silence. "Lilly..?" He asks quietly. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding in.

"When I was fourteen I came home from school one day. It was really sunny out. I remember my parents rushing around the place, they were freaking out."

Julian rubs circles on my back reassuringly. "I've never seen my parents panic or get mad. They were always so calm. I didn't  remember what exactly happened but somehow I ended up  in the small storage closet in my parents bedroom. The way they were acting, it scared me. I heard voices  downstairs. It sounded like someone broke in. I heard shouting. Then I saw my parents were being shoved into the room. There were two men with them. I think they weren't alone. I could hear people downstairs as well. They were yelling at them, asking where she was. My parents were so scared, I had never seen my mom cry in her life. Even when my grandma died. They threatened them. And then I heard a gunshot. I saw them slump on the floor, blood spilled out of them into the wooden floor" I choke a breath in.

"I went to live with my aunt and uncle in New York. I was diagnosed PTSD. I had night terrors and would get panic attacks. I started taking meds a few months after they-they died. They wouldn't always work, but they helped. I stopped taking them over the summer. I was fine and now I don't know"  I try to swallow a lump stuck in my throat.

I take in a shaky breath. I squeeze my eyes shut trying to calm myself down. I felt like I was frozen. A girl of ice , I could shatter at any moment.

"I-I'm so sorry. I had no idea-"

"Of course you didn't" I snap , opening my eyes.

Julian presses his lips together into a tight line.

I sigh "I mean, there was no way that you could have known. I'm just some girl who walked into your life two months ago and now I'm blurting out all of my secrets" that was a lie, he still didn't know who I was. I plan on keeping it that way.

"I'm just some stupid broken girl that can't spend two minutes without falling apart. I should go" I say abruptly starting to get up.

"Lilly wait" Julian grabs my arm and yanks me back to him. I fall on his lap. I brush my hair out of my face. "No- Julian" I struggle trying to free myself from his grasp.

"Lilly-" he starts. He grabs my waist pulling me to him. Somehow in between my struggles and Julian trying to get me to stop struggling. I end up sitting on his lap, my legs on either side of his, cradling him.

"Fine!" I shout running my fingers through my hair in frustration "What, Julian? What do you have to tell me so badly?"

Julian takes a breath "I-" he stares at me, with this look. The look, like I was the moon. He looked at me in wonder. Like I was the beautiful thing in the world.

I shake my head "Don't" I say.

"Don't what?" He breathes, still staring at me. "That. Don't give me that look, stop. It's not going to work. I know what you do. You're just some fuckboy who wants to win a game with his friends."

"God, Lilly. How many do I freaking have to say it. I don't care about the stupid  game. I've told you, I just want to make sure you're okay-" He yells

"I don't want you to care, just stop. I am not good for you. You shouldn't have to be dragged into my mess of a life" I yell back

"Why are you doing this? You're so fucking stubborn, why do you always freak out when I try to be a good boyfriend-"

"Exactly!" I point out "You're not my boyfriend, this is a game! Get. It. Through. Your. Thick. Skull. This is just some game I-"

"Why did you make up this 'game'" he says making air quotes with his hands "Why even bother? I've been wondering that for a long time. Why go through the trouble of just-"

"I don't know!" I explode "I don't know okay?" I lie to him, I couldn't let him know. "I just-I just don't know" I finish quietly, looking down. Avoiding his gaze.

Julian reaches over and lifts my chin so I meet his gaze. We sit there silently watching each other. I cup his check. My thumb running over his lips. I trace his face over softly. His blue eyes never leave mine. I can feel my heart beat speed up.

His gaze flickers down to my lips. My tongue darts it to lick my lips nervously. Slowly he starts to lean in, I close the gap between us.

His lips capture mine. It's not like our other drunken kiss, where it was heat and passion. That kiss was rough and full of lust.

This one was soft, we weren't rough. Julian kissed me as if I were fragile, the kiss was sweet. As if it were the first kiss of some 15 year old girl in a cliche movie. But I didn't mind.

Julian's hands moved down to my hips as he pulled me closer. My hands had slipped upwards to the nape of his neck. My fingers twisted in his dark hair.

The kiss began to build. I felt out of breath, but in a good way. Julian tugged on my lip. I let out a breathy moan. Julian then began placing little kiss all over my face.

On my jawline, on my nose, on my forehead. He then began to kiss along my neck. I tilted my head to the side, allowing him more access. I let out a sigh of content.

Julian's lips find mine again as he gives me one more kiss. "Lilly.." he whispers against my lips. I shush him "Don't say anything " I murmur back. He nods his hand in understanding.

We eventually turn our attention back to the movie. I start to drift off to sleep, it's been a long night. My eyes start to flutter shut. Before I'm able to find sleep I feel Julian's lips press softly against my forehead. "Goodnight , Lillian" he whispers, he must think I'm totally asleep.

Wait, what did he just say..?

A/N:

Ah yes, a cliffhanger. Mwahaha.

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~TheaMenez