Blood Stained Collar BOOK 2 of The Collar Series #Wattys2017 ( BDSM )

CHAPTER 41

The walls of her apartment seemed to be closing in on her as she watched Reece bury his head in his hands. His shoulders slumped forward and he never made a sound. She couldn't even tell if he was still breathing. Her head throbbed. She needed air and raced towards the open balcony doors. "Why?" She asked the heavens as she looked up at the night sky. "Why do I keep finding myself in such emotional situations?" Her fingers gripped the balcony railing. Her knuckles went white and it wasn't until her hands cramped up that she let go and massaged the palms of her hands.

"Here, let me." Reece took her hands in his and massaged away the cramps. Without looking up he spoke softly. "You know how I feel about you. You are my world and I'm madly in love with you." He looked up. "Mel, I'm sorry, but I can't just give you up, not without a fight. I need to meet this Cirrus of yours and see what I'm up against. What I need to do to win your heart."

Melanie had not heard him walking up behind her and when he took her hands in his, she felt so guilty for hurting him. Did she love him? Yes, she had to be honest with herself. She did love him but she wasn't in love with him. Something inside her held her back from giving her heart to him completely and that something was... her heart ached at the thought of his name.

"Reece, I don't think..."

"I won't take no for an answer and besides all I need to do is check hospital admissions to find him. Is that what you want me to do?"

"What good is it going to do, seeing him?"

"I want to see the man who is trying to steal you away from me. I want to know why he let you go in the first place and why now, why has he come looking for you now?" He squeezed her hands tighter than he intended to.

"Oww!" She pulled her hands away.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to."

"It's okay. No bruises." She said as she stretched her fingers out.

He caught her left hand in his and rubbed his fingers round her ring finger. "I had hoped to put a ring on this finger one day, in the not too distant future."

"Reece... I... I don't know what to say, or how to make this better."

"It is what it is Melanie. But it won't stop me loving you or trying to win your heart. Your Cirrus needs to know I'm no pushover and I will do everything I can to prove I am the one you should be with. You can't deny how happy we were until that damn plane crash and he came back in to your life. Just two days ago we were perfect for each other. We've made love nearly every night and you can correct me if I am wrong, but more often than not, you made the first move. You wanted me, just as much as I wanted you. You were on fire when we had sex. You gave all of yourself to me and now... Mel, please babe, think this through before you make any decisions. Your future is here with me, here at this hospital, you and I working together, living together, loving each other." Still holding her left hand in his, Reece fell to his knees.

"Reece, what are you doing? Get up please, get off your knees. Don't do this please. Oh God Reece, please don't beg. This is not you. You are stronger than this." Melanie tried to pull him up, but when he refused to stand she knelt in front of him. She felt the tears running down her cheeks before she realized she was crying.

When Reece saw her tears, he let go her hand and wiped them away and held out his arms to her. He waited for what seemed and eternity before she folded into his arms.

"I never wanted to hurt you. I just don't know what to do. I'm so confused." She thumped her chest. "I have such an ache inside of me now. Shit! Why does love hurt so much?"

"Babe, I'm so sorry to make you feel this way, but you must see it from my side. I'm in love with you and I can't just let you walk away. I couldn't live with myself if I didn't try to make you see that you belong with me. It's because I love you so much that I have to fight for you." He lifted her chin up so he could look into her eyes. "You wouldn't be hurting this much if you didn't have feelings for me." He kissed her before she had time to say anything.

Feeling his arms wrap around her and his warm lips caressing hers, any thoughts of resisting crumbled and she melted into his kiss and for a moment she forgot everything else as he lifted her into his arms and carried her over to the bed.

Reece spooned in behind her on the bed and snuggled her into his arms, her back pressing firmly against his chest. He brushed her hair away from her neck and kissed it softly. He pulled her closer and whispered in her ear. "I love you Melanie McKinney and I always will."

"Reece, please, you're making this so hard for me. I just need some space to think."

"I won't say another word, but I'm not going anywhere. I left the other night and it was the biggest mistake. Everything... us... it all went downhill from then onwards."

Melanie turned around and looked at him. It cut her deep that he looked so sad. His eyes had lost their brightness and the frown on his forehead knitted his eyebrows together. No happy smile greeted her, as it had always done before, when she turned to face him. "Babe, please. My head is a jumbled mess and my heart is split in two. I just need some time, some space to think, without you telling me you love me."

"I just don't want you to forget and I'm not leaving here unless you kick me out."

"I won't forget. How can I forget when I will be coming home to you every day?"

"You're not kicking me out?"

She smiled. "No, as long as your promise not to go down on your knees again." She rolled out of his arms and off the bed. "I'm going to shower and change out of my uniform. The food must be cold by now. Will you pop it in the microwave while I go shower?"

"Yes, sure. Then I'll come join you in the shower."

"I don't think it's a good idea. Not tonight anyway."

"Ohh, sorry I forgot for a moment. I guess we're on a "friends only" basis for now." He turned and dragged his feet towards the kitchen.

"Reece, I will understand if you want to go back to your apartment and maybe it might be for the best for now."

"I'm not going anywhere. I've walked out once and I'm sure as hell not going to make that mistake again. Go shower."