Love Will Remember (Camren)

Chapter 5: The REAL Truth about Jauregui

Previously..

"Well Camz, how about we start with the beginning of the story?  It kind of leads up to that moment."  I said to her.  She nodded eagerly, falling back onto the bed.  I laid next to her and looked her in the eye.  "I told you stuff a while ago, about my past.  The night I first told you about my self harm, but I left out some pieces, so I guess I'll go back to the beginning..."

A/N: Hiii!  If you want a little background about Lauren's past and some of the things that aren't mentioned in detail in this chapter but are mentioned, reread chapter 14: The Truth About Jauregui in the story 'Who Are You'!  It'll make this chapter make a little more sense. :P

*Lauren's P.O.V*

Are you sure you're ready for this, Camz?" I asked her before I started my story.  I didn't really know how she'd react to it all, to be honest.  I've never actually told this story in full, only parts to therapists when it was required.  I wasn't quite sure how to even put a time line around it all.

Camila kissed my cheek, shaking me from my thoughts, "Yes, I am.  But I don't want to push you.  Are YOU ready to tell me?" Her eyes sparkled, she actually cared.

I nodded my head, taking a deep breath.  "Alright, Camila.  Like I told you a while ago, it started around when I was 14.  I was in the 8th grade, it was before the thing with Blaine happened.  It was around my birthday and I had thrown this big party.."

*Flashback.. 13 year old Lauren's P.O.V*

I bounced up to a group of girls who were standing by their lockers.  "Hi!" I smiled happily.  "I'm throwing this big 14th birthday party and I wanted to invite you guys!  I'm inviting like the whole grade, it's going to be the party of the year.  It's a pool party." I said smirking, trying to sound cool.  I handed each of them an invitation.

"Oh," one of the girl's smiled, flashing her teeth.  "We'll be there."  The rest of the girls in her group nodded. 

I went the rest of the day elated because the most popular girls in the grade had just agreed to come to my party.

The night of the party came and everything was set up perfectly.  A half an hour had past and no one had showed.  I sat on my couch alone waiting for someone to come but they didn't.  After an hour the doorbell rang.  I ping of hope ran through my body.  I got up and ran as fast as I could to the door.  As I flung open the door, chunks and a smelly liquid showered over me.  I looked at my feet to see it was broth and chicken fat that was now soaking through my new sneakers.  I took off my thick glasses, cleaning them off with a small dry part of my shirt.  I looked up to see the group of popular girls in front of me with a few boys.  The head girl smirked and let out and evil laugh, "Here's some fat for the little piggy." Her group began to snort in response.  "And did you darkish self actually think we'd let anyone come to your little pool party?  It's probably just a way for you to get to see girl half naked.  After all you are a little lesbian."  She glanced at her posy winning some laughter.  "Just a little, dirty, dorky, fat, loser, lesbian." she said getting close to my face, practically spitting in it.

With that she spun on her heals and walked away with her little group, leaving me alone in the doorway.

*End Flashback, back to current Lauren P.O.V*

 "I lied before, that's when I started purging.  Right after that happened I ran up to my bathroom and puked until my throat was raw and burning.  The words hurt more because I hadn't quite come to terms with my sexuality.  I mean, I have always known I was different but I was only 13.  I didn't know."  I paused, looking into Camila's sad eyes.  That's the day I decided I wasn't good enough, when I decided I needed to change, when I decided I was all alone, and when I decided no one would really love me because when I ran into the house covered in all that stuff, sobbing, my parents didn't even care.  They we're too drunk to notice." My breath hitched at the flashback I had pushed so back into my mind.  I looked up at Camila, sadness riddled in her eyes.