Updated 6/27/17
Brother...
I hate you so much.
People say its a teenage phase.
It's really not.
You ruined my childhood.
You ruined everything for me.
You continue to ruin it more and more with each passing moment.
You affected me for life.
You're the reason for who i am today.
You're the reason that I'm like this.
You're the reason why I have so many issues.
Because of you...my stress levels are through the roof.
A 14 year old shouldn't be stressing this much.
Because of you...i have terrible anger issues.
Any little thing you do,makes me instantly get angry and yell at the top of my lungs.
I lose my voice alot because of you.
Because of you...i am violent.
I used to be the sweetest girl there was And never would dare to lay a finger on someone,now...im still very nice to people, but i hurt them unintentionally.
I could be play fighting but then it turns into something more.
I sometimes choke people without thinking about it.
I really dont mean to.
I instantly regret it.
I have lost people.
I have an image because of you,and its not good.
Some people are afraid of me.
I don't want to be seen as that.
I want to be seen as this girl who is loved by everyone and is nice.
But instead I'm...me.
I don't do it much anymore,maybe even rarely but a while ago,i used to get angry to the point that i would feel as if i was...crazy?
I used to always go in the corner of a room,sit down,pull my knees up,rock back and forth,whisper things,and pull at my hair.
Instead of stopping what you were doing that caused me to do that you just kept on doing it.
You even say there laughing while i was doing it,having tears stream down my face.
You used to look right at me and call me crazy...physotic...
You used to call ne all these things.
You never stopped.
You looked at the scars on my arm and said that "I'm a follower" "I'm crazy" "only emo people do that" "I'm stupid" "it's useless".
