roses // yoonkook

Chapter Eleven

Jungkook slowly opened his eyes, breathing slowly to see that Yoongi was nowhere. There also wasn't any nurse around and his throat felt dry and he couldn't talk loud. He felt a panic coming up without the familiar trusted aura of Yoongi around him. He was now alone, again. As always.

Yoongi had fed well. Jimin had cooked while he was at the hospital. Yoongi had wolfed down a considerable amount. After all, he had skipped his last two meals. Jimin had them pushed him into the room asking him to wash up and sleep. And Yoongi did just that. He didn't let his insecurities grip at him as he thought back to how Jungkook pushed him away, asking him to leave. He wondered if he really meant it or if he was just too emotional to say anything else. But with the water that rushed down his thin body, he washed away his negative thoughts, looking forward to lying in his bed again. When he had dried up and come out of the bathroom in his sweatpants and sweatshirt, he was almost surprised to see Jimin and Rose already there in his bed. Smiling at how easily everything had gone back to normal, he laid in bed next to them, his arm around Rose's smaller figure, letting her purrs lull him to sleep.

Jungkook hardly remembered what he did yesterday, but he only remembered that he send Yoongi away. A decision he regretted. He wanted Yoongi back with him. And how. He was ready to take his phone and call Yoongi right there at the moment, but he also knew he wanted to think. He couldn't forgive Yoongi like this. Even if he loved Yoongi. He knew that he wasn't good enough for Yoongi. He wasn't pretty and he made stupid decisions that would affect Yoongi in bad ways he didn't want to. He shouldn't be with Yoongi ever.

Jungkook fell into his thoughts until his personal nurse walked in with a bright smile on her face and a cart with food on it. They gave him a personal nurse because maybe he would talk more with her.

"How are you Jungkook?" She asked with a smile. "Did you see the note that the person from yesterday left?"

"You mean Yoongi?" Jungkook said with his barely hearable voice.

"That's his name?" She asked while she sat down to give him his food. "Dear Jungkook-ah," she paused a moment "I left after you fell asleep, I hope you're not too worried, I'm going to eat and sleep at home, If you want me to return, I left my phone number at the reception, Yoongi Hyung," she ended.

"Can you call him after I ate?" Jungkook asked the nurse while pursing a smile out. She nodded as she helped him eat while Jungkook carefully started to use help holding the food with his hands.

Yoongi had laid in his bed even after Jimin had left for work, telling him his coffee was in his travel mug and his breakfast was covered and on the kitchen counter. He pushed himself off his bed only when Rose meowed at him longingly, pawing all over his duvet. Carrying her carefully in his arms, he went to the living room and gave her her food before fetching his own, sighing in relief when he realised his coffee was exactly how he liked it.

It was almost eleven on the clock when his phone rang. He barely understood anything after hearing the name of the hospital. He told the receptionist he'd be there as soon as possible and hung up. And he did get there in less than half an hour, which was quite a feat because the hospital itself was fifteen minutes away and he was in his PJ's (he hadn't changed). He rushed without preamble to Jungkook's room, pushing it open gently.

"Hi Jungkook..." He sighed finally, smiling sheepishly. Jungkook tried to look up as he heard the door open seeing Yoongi rush in.

"Hi Hyung," Jungkook replied with a smile as he heard Yoongi walk closer to the bed. As Yoongi stopped walking standing in front of the bed he noticed that Yoongi was wearing only PJ's.

"You're in your PJ's, Hyung," he grinned as he smiled pointing with his functioning arm to the chair next to the bed.

Yoongi laughed lightly at that, sitting down next to Jungkook. "I know I am but you called for me, how could I think of anything else? And I'm sure we're comfortable enough to wear PJ's around each other... Aren't we?" Yoongi sat comfortably before continuing, "Did you have breakfast?"

"We are," Jungkook smiled as he tried to find the remote for the bed so he could sit up more again. "I had breakfast," He said. "I'd rather want your bacon sandwiches," he added as he finally got the remote for the bed and lifted up the head of the bed to sit up a little more straight.

"I'm glad you think so but it's not okay for me to bring food for you here. So you'll just have to wait till you can get discharged for my cooking. Did I ever make my braised seafood for you?" Yoongi asked, leaning against the rails.

"You didn't," Jungkook said with a smile. "I'd love to eat it one day Hyung," Jungkook continued as he looked at Yoongi in his sweatpants and an old tshirt where the holes started to fall in.

"You'll burn a new hole into my t-shirt if you stare like that," Yoongi chuckled. "I'm looking forward to making it for you." He added with a soft smile.

"I don't have laser eyes," Jungkook joked as he looked away. "I want to draw again-," he stopped for a second looking at Yoongi. "My drawing materials, where are they?" Jungkook's big eyes looked to Yoongi. "Can you get them for me?"

"I think I could get them," Yoongi said nodding, "I'm joining there again in a couple of weeks so I'm sure I'll be allowed. Especially since I have history. I'll get them for you, don't worry." Yoongi paused before touching on a more sensitive subject, "I... Was told that you jumped wearing the hoodie and jeans I'd given you all those days back... Why that?"

"I-I-I," Jungkook stuttered he didn't know why he did it. "I-I m-missed y-you, I-I r-realized I-I l-loved y-you," Jungkook said while he tried to stop his tears. "I-I w-wanted t-to h-have a p-piece o-of y-you w-with me," he said as a tear rolled down his cheek

Yoongi reached out and wiped away his tear, "I'm so sorry you felt that way. I wish I'd told you... Then we wouldn't be here, I'm so sorry..." Yoongi couldn't hear it, he couldn't hear Jungkook break down like that, not now when Jungkook meant a lot more to him than his patient.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Jungkook asked as he wiped away a tear with his functioning hand. He looked down ignoring the pain in his neck, which already decreased a lot than the days before. The tears falling on the white sheets.

"I don't know... I honestly don't know why I didn't. I... I didn't want to burst the bubble we had created. You were so close to getting out to go to the art school... I didn't want you sad but it backfired in the worst way possible... But I tried talking to you after! Yes, I did send Jimin but you could have talked to me through him. I really wanted to hear you'd gotten out. I was always thinking about you and hoping you were getting closer to coming out Jungkook, I'm so sorry..." Yoongi grasped the white sheets tightly, holding back the stinging in his eyes.

"I shouldn't have shut out Jimin," Jungkook said with regret as he still faced the sheets while the tears dropped on the fabric. "We both shouldn't have done things, but we can't change it," Jungkook said as he looked up. "I'm sounding like you now," he joked to make the mood around them lighter.

Yoongi scoffed as he rolled his eyes exaggeratedly. "You say that as if I'm like 80." He chuckled and looked back at Jungkook, "it's alright, at least that means you're progressing. And that also means I'm proud of you."

"You mentally are," Jungkook grinned as he held his hand open so Yoongi could put his hand in his. "But that's okay," Jungkook said with a smile.

"I guess I'll just die at the mental age of like 200," Yoongi said simply and put his hand in Jungkook's. "And I'll make you age too," he warned as he laid his head by Jungkook's waist, looking up at him.

"No I want to stay young," Jungkook grumbled as he looked at Yoongi lying his head next to him. He looked at the other arm in the cast he could hardly move. "I'm tired," he said looking at Yoongi. "I hope to heal soon," he mumbled as he closed his eyes. "With you next to me," he added softly as he dreamed away.