Calmly || Be More Chill

Michael Has An Argument

Ever since the play, Jeremy has gone out of his way to not speak a word about the kiss. It's like he couldn't remember what happened, but I know he did. Because out of the corner of my every time we would play video games in my basement, he would look at me. He had this look of regret in his eyes, and I couldn't help but wonder if I was the one he was regretting.

As the lunch bell rang, I reached the cafeteria and walked over to our usual table. Jeremy was seated there first, as per usual since my previous class was farther than his.

He grinned and waved me over, eager to show me something on his handheld video game. I frowned at how "buddy buddy" he was acting. But that's what we were, right? Buddies. Friends. Compadres. Then, what was With messing with my feelings and kissing me where everyone that we knew could witness it?

"Hey, Michael, look I-" he realized that I was practically fuming and I watched as his body shrunk into himself a bit.

"What do you think you're playing at?" I asked loudly. It brought some attention over to our table, but I didn't care as much as Jeremy and his pink face did. "Answer me, Jeremy."

He sat still and quiet, a look of confusion splayed out on his face for everyone to see. Jeremy tilted his head to the side and squinted his eyes in the slightest, making him look like a confused kitty. That wasn't fair, he knows I'm subject to whatever he says when he uses that face. He was cheating.

Despite Jeremy's tactics, I stood strong, "I get that maybe you'd need some time to think, but it's been three weeks. And all that time, you know what you've been doing? Acting like we didn't kiss in front of all of the people in this place."

A crowd had formed, curious to hear what Jeremy had to say for himself. I myself was curious to, but the boy only reddened even more and pursed his lips.

Maybe I shouldn't have done this...

"Don't you know that that kiss meant more to me?" I inquired desperately. "I've been waiting twelve years for it, Jeremiah Heere. This is not what I had imagined it to be."

Some girls in the crowd gasped at the words, everyone getting emotionally involved with our fight. But it seemed like a one sided argument. That is, until Jeremy actually had something to say for himself.

"Sometimes all of our fantasies don't come true, Michael."

My heart tore in half.

I could've sworn I heard a ripping sound.

"What?" My voice cracked as tears welled up in my eyes at his harsh tone.

Jeremy huffed and rephrased his words, "I'm not gay. Just because I'm a guy and you're a guy doesn't mean we're meant to be."

But that wasn't it. Jeremy wasn't just a guy, Jeremy was there with me for a large majority of my life. Jeremy is my life. Without him, I probably would've ceased to exist a few years back. Jeremy and I have to be meant to be.

Although, the universe has it's casualties.

Heat rushed up and down my arms and face as fat tears escaped from my eyes. Without saying a word, I made my way to exit the school. It wasn't the first time I had ditched, and Mom would definitely understand seeing as I only did this twice. Both times being hurt either physically or mentally.

On my way out, Rich and Jake caught up with me. "Are you okay, man?" Rich asked softly.

I nodded and attempted a smile, when I failed, Jake frowned. I shook my head, "Really, I'm okay. Don't worry. And also, c-congratulations on the new relationship."

"Thanks," they both echoed quietly, holding each other's hands tightly.

Without a second thought, my feet carried me back home, as I walked in the cold.

(A/N): Adding an author's note because without it, the word length of this chapter is making me frightened.