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Chapter 4

Marks POV
I really did feel bad that Racesa thought Seán or I would do that to her. It was like two in the morning but I couldn't get to sleep after that. I decided to get up and I went for a shower. As I got in I let the warm water run down my back. I began to think about everything she had said. I was the one that had whipped her in her dream. It was me. And Seán held her down. I began to wonder if she was whipped before she went into foster care. I shook my head trying to forget it for the time being. I focused on just getting through my shower. When I finished and had gotten dressed it was around two-thirty. I when back to bed with Seán and desperately tried to sleep but to no avail. Seán rolled over, sat his head on my chest, opened his eyes and said.

I can't sleep either baby.
I just, *sigh*, I don't understand where that even came from. I said still trying to figure out why
Remember Mark, she has trust issues, particularly pointed at men. It may take her a long time to fully trust us. Seán reminded me
I think it's time we read that file Seán. I said
Alright. He said grabbing it off the nightstand.

I opened it up and looked through the fist page.

Full name: Racesa Evelyn Pierce
Birthdate: 10/02/03
Sex: Female
Mother: Katie Pierce
Father: Mike Pierce

Siblings: Half brother Anthony-Shane (currently living with his father).
Description: Racesa came to us at age ten. Before then she was kept at a police officers house after being found naked, tied to a bed with multiple belt lashes across her back. It's was also later confirmed that she had been rapped. According to Racesa this was not something new to her. She described that her mum had died when she was three from what she was told was cancer. She explained after that, that "daddy" or in other words Mike would often come home drunk and would hit her, throw her into walls, whip her, or he would rape her. Racesa had an extremely rough childhood. Just before Racesa's thirteenth birthday she began to show signs of MDD. She didn't eat often, she would often wear sweaters (even in the summer), she seemed emotionless. She also showed signs of anxiety. She wouldn't talk to anybody she didn't know, she took a long time to trust anybody (mainly men), she seemed very secluded, she barley left her room unless it was for school or sometimes for food. When she found out she was being adopted by Mark Fichbach and Seán McLoughlin all the depression symptoms seemed to lessen little by little. Racesa enjoys listening and walking in the rain.

I didn't dare to read the read he rest. The rest didn't tells us much about her anyway, nothing we can't just ask. Just descriptions about her Mum, Dad, and Brother. What her school life was like. That kind of stuff. This is something you just don't forget. That explains a lot about her behaviour. I want to keep an eye on her, maybe if I see anything to bad I'll take her to counselling. I know Seán can relate to her, his dad did quite a bit to him after he found out about us. He was so nice and then he found out Seán was gay and, well, I guess he just snapped. Seáns parents are still together but from what I hear things aren't going to well. Seán did mention something about taking Racesa to meet his parents though. He was looking for flights to Ireland yesterday. Soon I fell asleep thinking of what Seán and I had planned for tomorrow with our beautiful little girl. I woke up and went downstairs to make breakfast. Bacon, eggs, toast, pancakes, and omelettes because why not, Seán like omelettes. I felt a pair of arms wrap around my back.

Well good morning my little cutie. I said turning to give Seán a quick kiss then back to the food
Making a feast I see. Seán said
Yah, yah. Wanna go wake up Racesa? I asked
Yah sure, I'll be back in a few. Seán said running up the stairs

Seáns POV
I walked upstairs to get Racesa up for the day. I opened her door and walked over to her bed.

Racesa. I said softly
S-Sean? She asked
Yes chiki? I once again said softly
What time is it? She asked
Almost nine. I told her
Okay, can you help me pick our some cloths? She asked
I don't really know much about cloths but I can try. I said walked over to her closet

I looked through her stuff and pulled out a black tank top, a pair of jean shorts, socks and left the rest to her. I walked downstairs and told Mark she'd be down in a minute. She came down, sat at the table, and Mark began to put stuff on her plate.

So Racesa. How was your sleep? Mark asked
Good. What's on the seclude today? She asked
Well, I was thinking the beach. I said
Fun. I'll have to look for a bathing suit after we finish eating. Racesa said
Sure. I was thinking we could invite Evan, Sydney, and Logan. Mark suggested
Yah sure. Speaking of, is logan adopted? He doesn't look like Aven or Sydney at all. Racesa asked
Yah, he is actually. He's from Scotland. His mum and dad were in a car accident when he was eleven. He's fourteen now I believe. I said
Until November. Mark said
Oh. Racesa said
Somebody has a crush. Mark teased
Maybe, so what? Racesa said sarcastically
I don't know, but it's cute. He's definitely coming. I said
Yah, yah. I'm going to find a bathing suit. Racesa said

Racesa's POV
After I placed my plate in the sink I went up to my room. I went into my closet and pulled out every bathing suit Molly, Marzia, and I picked out....they were all bikinis. I chose a neon green bikini with black stripes and threw it on. I looked in the mirror once I had it on. I look ugly. I hate it. I mean, I'm fat. I'm so fat. Once Logan sees me like this he'll know I'm fat. He'll leave, I mean, who wants to date a fat person.

Racesa? You ready? Seán called
Yah, I'll be down in a minute. I called throwing on some pants and a shirt on over my bikini and grabbing my bag.

I ran downstairs and jumped in the car with Mark and Seán. I really didn't want to let logan see me in my bikini but I didn't have much of a choice. We stopped at a red light and I saw a sign that said "archery club".

Mark! It's an archery club! I said
Yah? What about it? He asked
Man where I used to go to school when we'd have archery in Phy.Ed class my teacher would always ask me where I learned to shoot! I said remembering it
I will have to see this. Maybe tomorrow? Mark suggested
That would be great. I said

Then we kept driving. Finally we made it to the beach where Aven, Sydney, and Logan already were. I walked onto the beach and sat on the sand with Mark.

That water looks nice. Mark said
Yah. I agreed
Why aren't you in the water? I thought  you liked swimming? Mark asked
Yah I do, just...I feel really insecure about myself and my bathing suit. I dragged off
Show me. He said
What? I asked
Show me, I mean. I'm sure you don't look that bad in it. Mark said
Slowly I showed him. He smiled and then began giggling.
What?! I asked
Mark pointed into the water somewhere. I looked over and saw Logan, mouth wise open. Then a wave crashed over him and he got a mouth full of sea water.
See, you don't look bad in it at all. What are you so insecure about? Mark asked
I pointed to my stomach.
If you really want I can help you work on it but I think you look fine the way you are. Mark asked
That would be great. Now come on, please get in the water with me. I said
I don't like the ocean. Mark said
I don't like ones I'm not familiar with. I said
Fine. Do you surf? Mark asked
I've always wanted to. I said
Well come on, I'll teach you. My brother Thomas taught me before I became afraid of the water. Mark said
Why are you afraid of the water? I asked
Because I know what's there, I've never seen a shark attack or anything but still. What about you? Mark asked
My older sister died to a shark attack. I was swimming with her, well, she was trying to teach me how to surf. That was when mum was still around. I said smiling a little thinking about Anishia-Lee and Mum
I see, well, grab a board. Mark said

I grabbed a board painted to look like a rainbow and followed Mark into the water. We paddled out onto a wave and he taught me how to go under a wave. Then the water was only a little wavy so he taught me to balance. We spent all day working on it and then around supper time I caught, and rode my first wave. Seán, Aven, Sydney, Mark, and Logan clapped as I screamed "I'm doing it" at the top of my lungs. I rode the wave as far in as I could and then walked the rest.

Guess we're gonna have to get you a board. Seán said
That would be fun. I said
That looked amazing. Logan said hugging me
Thanks. I said
You know, I never thought you'd look that good in a bikini. Logan said
Mark must have tipped him off. Damn Mark. Thanks. I said
Logan kissed me and then went back into the water. I turned to face Mark.
First kiss? Marks asked
Nope, he got me last night. I said giggling as I made my way back into the water.

I surfed for another couple hours and even taught myself a few tricks. Then I returned my board and we went home.