The Writer and the Singer (Harry Styles AU)

Chapter 27

     Harry came back that Monday. Aubrey's lungs siezed when she saw him sitting at their lunch table. She wasn't sure what to make of the fact that Louis and he were on opposite ends of the table from each other. A moment after they came into her view the others noticed her approaching. A forced smile was plastered on her face and Harry turned a dark shade of red, his eyes quickly flitting away and Louis suddenly became intensely interested in a loose string on his shirt. It was apparent that the others were oblivious to the awkwardness amoung the three. As far as they knew Harry and Aubrey had had a meaningless fight and they ended up breaking up.

    Eleuthomania overtook Aubrey. Running away sounded like the best option. Aubrey was struck by the fact that she was in the middle of high school drama and honestly was repulsed. She planted herself in the seat next to Marie, despite her wish.

     An awkward silence passed before Niall spoke and asked, "So how were your weekends?" Harry's lips pressed into a firm line at that,  not that Aubrey noticed because she wasn't watching him to notice such things.

    Liam jumped in and said, "Sophia and I went on a date."

"Oooohhhh." Louis smirked. Liam just rolled his eyes.

"And when are you going to get yourself a girl?" Liam softly jibbed with genuine curiousity in his tone. Louis involuntarily reddened. Aubrey had never seen Louis blush before. She felt sorry for Louis, despite her self-recognized misaimed anger at him, for he seemed incapable of forming a sassy retort as he always does. He simply muttered, "Sod off."

    Harry redirected the attention to Zayn by asking, "What about you, Zayn?" Zayn began talking about sketching, not mentioning the subject of his work. Aubrey paid special mind to Marie, as they all listened.

     Aubrey watched Marie watching Zayn and she knew she would be quite pleased if they ended up dating. Her eyes seemed to soften the longer she looked at Zayn. Looking to Zayn Aubrey found his eyes dancing with a shocking warmth.

    The bell interrupted Aubrey's observing. She began gathering her things and looked up to meet Harry's gaze when he said her name. She was suddenly very aware that her memory had not captured the exact shade of green in his irises. Everything ached and she fretted she would remember everything about him for the rest of her life. Then again, she realized she maybe more concerned about not remembering every detail about him.

     She was brought back from her thoughts to the picnic table in front of her as Harry continued, "Aubrey, can I...um do you think I could talk to you?" The disappointment that washed over her at the loss of contact with his emerald eyes when he turned his head confused her. She should hate him. She should have told him she never wanted to speak to him again. But she didn't. "I don't know that that's a good idea, Harry." She really didn't think it was, especially for herself. "Please, Aubrey I know you probably hate me.  I know that, but I really- I'm just so sorry." The way his voice cracked made Aubrey nod slowly.

     "Do you mind skipping out on your next class? I really want to talk to you now." Aubrey thoughts were skewed as she immediately shook her head, indicating she didn't mind. They turned to the field and the forest that curved around it and began walking in the opposite direction of the school.

     "I just really need you to know how wretched I feel for doing that to you. I didn't intend on kissing him that day and I swear that was the only time anything like that happened. I really think I love you and I know I don't have the right to say that to you now, but I think I do. I know you already consider us broken up and I hope you could forgive me eventually. I need some time to figure out what I want right now. Is there anyway you could forgive me? I don't want to stop hanging out with you."

"I...yes. Yes, I do." Aubrey replied. For a moment there was such an air of relief, they just enjoyed their ease of breath.

    There was an extended silence as they travelled deeper into the forest before Harry's demeanor changed, becoming more solemn and he said, "Right before that night I was going to tell you something and I think I need to tell you now: My sister, Gemma, died when I was 13. We were four years apart. My mum thought she was going through a phase when she pierced her nose and dyed her hair. Gem got some new friends and I think they were the ones who introduced her to drugs. She died of an overdose. I found her on our bathroom floor. I'd never seen anyone be as pale as she was. She wasn't responding, but she couldn't be dead; she was my big sister, she couldn't be dead...but she really was." He took a breath to steady himself. At this point the tears were flowing in a constant stream down Harry's splotchy cheeks. A few tears escaped Aubrey over the girl she hadn't known existed until moments ago.

"Growing up we never really fought and we were incredibly close. I know she would've told me what to do now and I'm sorry, but I don't know how to do that on my own."           

     "I don't know how to stop history from repeating itself with Niall now. And Aubrey, when I found you on the bathroom floor, I couldn't even consider that I had found you...in the state I did Gemma." He shivered, the thought visibly chilling him. A new wave of guilt washed over Aubrey at the reminder of Harry finding her bleeding on her bathroom floor. Harry shouldn't have had to go through that again nor at all. She felt even more horrible about it than she did before.

     After a moment he laughed a humorousless laugh saying, "The universe really is against me, isn't it?" Aubrey had never seen Harry so cold before. "Harry, just because bad things happen to you, doesn't mean you deserve them to; you don't. I can't tell you how sorry I am about your sister. It's dreadful and I wish it could be taken back." Aubrey yearned for her words to comfort him, however she doubted they did.

"Thank you, Aubrey. I'm so impossibly sorry you got caught in the middle of me trying to figure everything out." She couldn't say it was ok; she instead replied, "I hope you do."

*Author's Note: I'M TERRIBLY SORRY FOR THE WAIT FOR THIS CHAPTER. School has been chaotic because it's almost the end of the year. I'll update more as much as I can. Once school is out, I'll update much more often. There's some character development in this chapter, that hopefully made somethings fall into place. Please don't forget to vote/comment! I love you all more than words. xx*