Paper Hearts ▪ Lams

20

April 15th, 2017

The Miranda High School Library

Senior Year

//goodbye love, you flew right by love//

Alexander stood outside of the library with a poster and a bouquet of white roses, John's favorite.

Prom was the next weekend, and Alexander was going to ask John to be his date.

It was after school hours. Alexander knew that John always studied in the library for an hour after classes ended, and he had planned every moment out thoroughly.

He was about to turn the corner when he heard a voice.

"Hey John," a man said rather seductively.

"Charles Lee?" John asked, surprised. He closed his book, "What the hell are you doing at this school? Shouldn't you be cheerleading across the street or something?"

Alexander chuckled softly.

"Ha ha, very funny," Charles stood in front of John with a smirk, "I actually came over here to ask you if you wanted to go to my school's prom with me."

Alexander felt his heart drop to his stomach.

John scoffed, "What made you think that I would accept that offer?"

"Maybe this can change your mind?" Charles trailed his finger down the outline of John's jaw. Alexander peered around the corner as Charles forcefully kissed John. Alexander felt his stomach drop further into the ground. John squinted harshly and pushed Charles off of him.

"What the hell, dude?" he yelled. Alexander smirked.

"What are you not gay?" Charles asked, leaning a little too close to John.

"Uh," John stuttered, "N-No."

Alexander knew that John was only trying to get Charles away from him, but he was still hurt by his answer. His confidence faltered.

"Oh," Charles said, "That sucks. I would've loved to have a piece of that," he winked before leaving through the back door, "If you ever do change your mind, give me a call."

"Don't keep your hopes up!" John yelled back.

Charles paused, a sly smile growing on his face. He casually walked over to John and placed his hands on his shoulders.

John jumped in surprise, "I thought that you already left, dick face," he said, the annoyance highly evident in his voice.

"Are you not accepting my offer because you're waiting for a certain someone to ask you?" he asked, leaning down to John's ear.

John blushed deeply.

"A certain someone named Alexander, maybe?" John's face became redder. Alexander felt his heart leap.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," John said, pushing his chair out and standing up quickly.

"Oh come on, John," Charles rolled his eyes, "You've had heart eyes for that boy since the seventh grade, don't try to deny it."

Alexander's breath hitched. Had John actually liked him for that long? A pang of guilt rose in his chest, but he brushed it off quickly.

"Alexander Hamilton?" John asked. He chuckled, "No. We're just really close friends."

Alexander felt his heart break.

Is that really how John saw him? As just his best friend? After all they had been through, he was stuck in the fucking friend zone?

"Whatever you say, lover boy," Charles closed the door loudly, winking at John as it closed.

John sighed loudly, sitting down in the chair that he had pushed out. He ran his hands through his hair roughly.

Alexander stood next to the doorway in tears. He dropped the bouquet of white roses. They hit the ground hard and tore apart.

Alexander walked out the door, gripping the poster that held his never asked question. Tears stained his cheeks as he made his way home. He had about ten minutes until John came back, leaving enough time to trash the poster and plaster a smile on his face before anyone saw.

He never did look back at the library.

If he did, he would've found John staring at the crumbled white roses with tears in his eyes.

Because he only ever told Alexander that white roses were his favorite.