[✓] LOVING HIM ━ tk.

[SEIZE] lifeless

THIRD PERSON

taehyung stood in front of the mirror behind his door, looking at himself before he would go downstairs and try to eat breakfast. there in front of him reflected a pale, skinny and weary teenager who wanted to just leave everything and everyone. he swallowed, lowering his head to look at his wrists, decorated with scars and bandaids. at this point, he wasn't breathing, but thinking. thinking about how life would be like if he chcose jeongguk over jimin. or if jimin had never cheated on taehyung, and if life would have been perfect. instead, he'd see the reflection he wanted to see his whole life— success.

he was tired. gone was the sleep he got, the peaceful moments where life hadn't been so bad. he missed jimin, but the person he missed the most was jeongguk. the bunny teeth he'd flash after grinning when cracking a joke, and the way he'd squint his eyes when trying to be cute.

taehyung sighed and pulled down his sleeve to cover his scars. what's wrong with me? the only one he wanted to come back and wrap his arms around him would be jeongguk, but he knew that wouldn't happen soon.

he started to realize that jeongguk was fading away, back to the person he was before taehyung changed him. taehyung.. he was slipping into the darkness he was stuck in before. the depression he thought was gone— it came back. he slipped into the cracks of solitude and loneliness, and his social anxiety became worse.

in all truth, he wanted to die. the people he loved the most, they're gone and he's alone. damn it all, his mom doesn't even give a shit about his existence. an abusive mother and father, a dad who's never at home and a broken son. that was his family.

he slid down his door and put his head in his hands, letting the tears slip out. taehyung had been crying for so long he doesn't remember the last time he smiled. or, a real smile.

"i wanna die, i wanna die." he whispered through his sobs. "i miss you, taehyung. where are you? where did i go?"

"i don't feel like myself," taehyung cried. he wanted to just pull the trigger to his forehead and let himself fall. he was just so depressed that life didn't matter to him. "i wanna die today, i don't wanna be alive. where did i go?"

"where did you go, jeongguk?"

-

I STARTED CRYING WRITING THIS CHAPTER. also, i actually might just write in third person because like i said— it's easier for me to write this way instead of first person. is that okay???