summer of '17 • jenzie

epilogue

Mackenzie Ziegler
nine months after chapter 29

•••

"Hey." I hear Johnny's voice say through my phone. His face fills my screen, like I'm holding a mini Johnny in my hands. "How was your day at school?" He yawns, and background noise can be heard as he shuffles around. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

I smile, knowing that he genuinely cares how well my day went. "Not too bad. We finally got our new chem teacher– he's better than boring old Mr Johnston already." ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Johnny laughs before I ask him how his day went. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"Alright I guess. We had our first lecture, and I found it really hard to keep up with the talking you know? Like they talk so fast, honestly." ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I giggle, suddenly realising how much I miss him. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"I miss you so much." I smile affectionately. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"I fucking miss you more." He says huskily. "Do you know how many girls have asked for my number? I felt like saying piss off I'm taken, but I didn't because that's rude. Lol." ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I spit out the water I'm currently drinking, before laughing and coughing at the same time. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"Kenz? You good there?" He laughs worriedly. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I hold my hand out to the camera, signalling that I'm good and trying not to die. "I'm fine I'm fine!" I manage to croak out. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"You sure? I wish I could catch a plane 300 miles to come see you but that's not really an option right now." He smiles sadly, lights almost cheekily reflecting in his eyes. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"Remind me again why I can't just move to Toronto?" ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"Because I love you so much that I know you need a good education at home in Pittsburgh and because you have a family that loves you and you-" ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"Okay okay I didn't mean literally you doorknob!" ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"Me? A doorknob?" He gasps in mock horror. "How could you?" ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"Shut up." I smile. "I could have called you something way more offensive." ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"Oh yeah, like what?" ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"Loser. Moron. Stupid. Dumb. Annoying. Tidy freak. Nerd. Dork. Should I continue?" I sing, letting him know that I'm joking. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"Continue with all the reasons why you love me." He says, almost shyly, and I smile a radiant smile- I can feel it. It's when he's being like this; honest, vunerable and so... loveable, that I love him the most. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"Your honest, like you always tell me when I look amazing and when I don't. You... dress well! And I can't get enough of your freaking body." I start, knowing he's going to love the second statement. Sure enough, he grins, but his eyes are dancing and he dares me to go on. "You share your food with me– even your doritos. Oh– and you let me steal your milkshakes!
You make me eat when I need energy and I forget to, even though you're millions of hundreds of miles away. You always make sure our calls are coordinated so that it's always better timing for me, never for you. You tell me to be safe and never text while driving which is incredibly cute, and you always ask if I get home okay. You joke around with me and have fun with me– nobody else does that right now." I say, smile faltering. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Tears fill my eyes. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"I miss you. I love you. So much." I gasp, wiping my tears. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I zero my attention in on the screen, watching carefully to see his reaction. I notice that he's inside his car, and can't help feeling hurt. He must be going somewhere. Rainy noises come out my phone, alerting me that it's raining in Canada just like it is here. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
"Fuck, Mackenzie! I miss you very, very, very much." He smiles sadly, looking amused and cheeky again. Why does he keep acting like this? "But what if I told you I could see you? Like right now." ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀