Midnight Lullabies

53 | Ode to my innocence

There's poison ivy caught in between my bones and I wonder if that's what been holding me together all along

Perhaps it could explain the fumes that inch their way out of my veins and perhaps that's why my blood boils, scorching the scratched tiles

I watch it trail down my sides, gather underneath my fingernails, clinging onto my nail beds. Filthy reminder of my midnight sins but she promised it could turn me to gold. 'Solid impenetrable gold,' she said.

So I peel back the layers of melted sunlight behind my eyelids and watch it evaporate watch it sizzle watch it burn on my bloody palms. There's a sinister glow in my eyes now, a captivating condescending soul wrenching glare and I fail to recognize myself once more.

This new identity feels cool against my conscience, my morals are tattered at the edges and the frayed ends collect at my feet the same way my hair did when I snipped it back at the hotel bathroom.

There's something sinister staring back at me in the mirror, but she promised gold. Solid impenetrable gold.