Hold Me Tight (A Michael Clifford fanfic)

Ch.12 Part 1

The next day I woke up around 8:30 with Josh on my mind. I went downstairs to get some breakfast and was blinded by the sight of Calum's ass in the kitchen. "EEEPP CALUM PUT SOME DAMN PANTS ON, JESUS" I screamed as I put my hands over my face, covering my eyes. "Oi Calum, put some pants on, my sister's living here now" Ashton called from the couch as Michael and Luke erupted in laughter. "It's not funny guys" I yelled as I assume Calum grabbed some boxers out of the dryer. "Ok, I'm decent, somewhat" Calum says, laughing at the last part. I take my hands off my face and grab the box of cereal sitting on the counter, pour some milk, grab a spoon and sit down on the couch. The only place available is next to Michael, of course. I sit next to Michael, blushing slightly as the events of the night before replay in my head. I take a few bites and say "Hey Ash, I'm going out later" "out? where to?" He asks. "Just out, ok" I say hoping that he'll drop it. "Fine, whatever we don't really have anything do to today anyway" he says causing me to sigh in relief that he dropped it. I finish my cereal and go upstairs to take a shower. Once I get to my room I see I have a text from Josh. "Don't forget beautiful, 10:30 at Starbucks ;)"

I smile as I type back "I won't, can't wait" and with that I get in the shower. After I get out of the shower I wrap my hair in a towel and do my makeup, some eyeliner, mascara, and because I was feeling bold, some red lipstick, oh and some concealer, can't forget that. After I applied my makeup I blow dried my hair and straightened it. I put on a random All Time Low shirt and some skinny jeans with my black toms. After I was dressed I walked back into my bathroom, piling my bracelets on and smearing concealer on my arm when I suddenly realized, the boys could've seen my cuts. I started to freak out but calmed myself down by telling myself that the boys were barely awake enough to put their spoons in their mouths, but then the thought of Ash seeing my arm yesterday morning came back. I tried to brush it off thinking about Josh but I just couldn't shake the feeling. I walked out and sat on my bed, pulling up directions to Starbucks on my phone. I shut the screen off but kept the directions pulled up. I grabbed my purse, shove my wallet and phone in and walked downstairs. "I'm leaving now Ash, I'll be back in like an hour or something." "Ok" "woah, where are you going dressed up like that?" He asks noticing my appearance. "Out, stop acting like mom" I say as I walk out the door. I pull out my phone, unlocking it and I start walking the way the directions tell me to. Soon enough I'm at Starbucks, I order a vanilla bean frappichino as I wait for Josh. I sit down at a table and text him "Hey I'm here, where are you?" After 5 minutes I text him again "Hey where are you, are you coming?" After another 15 minutes it becomes apparent that I have been stood up. I stand up and walk out, tears forming in my eyes, I pull my phone out again to see how to get home. Tears start dripping down my face against my will as I walk home. Once I can see the house I start running, I burst through the door and run straight up to my room, past the four boys playing FIFA in the living room. Once I reach my room I slam the door and lock it and fall on my bed, crying my eyes out.

(🚨WARNING:this may be triggering for some of you. If you think it might just skip down to where you see another one of these🚨)

How could I be so stupid. How could I actually think someone could like me. I remembered that I had my blades in the bathroom. I got of bed, the pillowcase now stained with two black ovals, and walked over to the bathroom. I pulled a blade out of the bottom drawer, I held in my hand looking at it for a second before ripping my bracelets off and dragging the blade across my skin. One, two, three. How could I ever think someone like me anyways, I'm me, four. I'm ugly, five, stupid, six, pathetic, seven, and worthless, eight. I make several more random ones before throwing the blade on the counter. I inspect my arm before turning on the sink and placing it under the running water, it burned like hell but I was used to it by now.

(🚨Ok you're good now, continue reading🚨)

Ashton's P.O.V

The boys and I looked at each other confused. What the hell just happened? "What the hell just happened?" Michael asked, taking the words right out of my mouth. "She said she was going to back in an hour, she was only gone 30 minutes. Did she tell any of you where she was going?" I asked them. They all shook their heads no. "I'm going to go check on her" I say putting my controller down. I walk up the stairs and knock on her door "K, are you ok?" I can hear her crying. "Kirsten?" I knock on her door harder. When I don't get an answer I try to open the door, it's locked. With this I start beating on the door "K, open the door" when doesn't answer I scream downstairs "BOYS, ONE OF YOU GET THE KEYBTO KIRSTEN'S DOOR. AND HURRY!"

Michael's P.O.V

"BOYS, ONE OF YOU GET THE KEY TO KIRSTEN'S DOOR. AND HURRY!" Ashton shouts from upstairs. And that was all I needed to jump from the couch and run over to the junk drawer that held the key to Kirsten's door somewhere in it. I quickly found the key and raced up the steps. Luke and Calum exchanged confused looks and jumped up and followed me.

Kirsten's P.O.V

As the water ran over my arm I let my sobs take over, not hearing the pounding on my door or seeing Ashton enter my room until he was grabbing me and pulling me away from the sink.