Mistakes ||Sequel to Party||

17

Leondre's POV:
After an excessive long shower, I finally turn off the water and step out. I grab a towel and start drying my hair. It makes me think of the times when me and Charlie shower together and he dries my hair. When I'm alone I start to think. And it's usually just shitty, depressing thoughts. I hate it, but I can't help it.

I dry my body and then wrap the towel around my waist. I look at myself in the little mirror over the sink. Charlie usually comes up to me and hugs me from behind by now. I look behind me in the mirror, but he's not there. I have gotten a lot more confident since I met Charlie and he has helped me through so much. But I still have these moments when I can stare at myself in the mirror for God knows how long and just ask myself what the hell I'm doing here.

As a kid I always wanted to be something big and important when I grew up, but look at me. I'm 18 and I still haven't gotten anywhere. Charlie usually tells me that I'm still in school, that I'm still studying and that I have a lot of time to change the world. But I still feel really disappointed at myself. The 5-year old me feel really disappointed at the 18-year old me.

I sigh and walk out of the bathroom. I can't handle staring at myself any longer without starting to cry.
I pull on a 'Bring Me The Horizon' - hoodie and a pair of sweatpants. I just want to sit down and watch a movie really, but I promised Harvey that I would come and I'm not really the guy who breaks promises.

***

It had started to rain outside. I pull up my hood and shove my hands into my pockets. I walk down the street to the bus stop and lean against a lamp-post. I just stand there, staring out over the street when I suddenly hear some familiar voices. I slowly tilt my head a bit and see a gang of boys on the other side of the street. They walk over to the pedestrian crossing and then walk over the road. I pull up my hood further and look down at my feet, trying to get unnoticed.

At first, the voices gets further and further away, I almost can't hear them anymore. But then they come back. Maybe I should just walk down the street and hopefully find another bus stop on the way? I consider it for some seconds, before they get too close. And I decide that I don't want to get beaten up tonight.

I try to look as casual as possible, even though I probably look more like a mass murder with my black clothes and discrete walking. I leave the lamp-post and continue down the street on the pavement. I pray to God that the boys won't follow me and luckily the voices start to fade away. I want to make sure by looking behind me, but I'm too scared to turn around, so I just continue walking.

Soon I can't hear the voices at all and immediately feel relieved. After about ten minutes I find another bus stop and stop walking. I take a look at the clock, 8:43, I still have plenty of time.

It's so short, sorry.