“Didn’t I make everything clear? WE ARE OVER” I flinch as he shouts on me. I put the phone away from my ear and let a sob out, before returning it to my ear. I take deep breaths as I hear how hard he’s breathing. He doesn’t want to fix it, but I can’t let it go. I’m ready to forgive everything I just want to be with him. I can’t leave without him.
“Wilmer, let’s forget everything. Forget that I fucked our relationship up, forget that you got a child. Let’s try again. I promise it will work. It’s our last chance. If you hurt me this time, I will never ever come to your life again. I swear, Wilmer. If I hurt you, you will never see me again, I promise that too. You will forget about me, but give us one last chance, please.” I can’t hide it anymore and I start sobbing into the phone.
“Demi, I hurt you. Don’t you understand? I’m so sorry for that and I don’t want to hurt you even more. You deserve happiness and the only way to find it is let me go, forget about me, forget how much I hurt you.” He whispers and I can hear how his voice breaks.
“But you’re my fucking happiness, don’t you understand?” My voice is so desperate but I’m too busy to care. “Give us one last chance. One last chance, Wilmer, please.” I’m probably begging right now but everything is worth it. If he will come back to me, everything will be okay and I will be happy. I know my life won’t be perfect but I don’t want perfect life anymore. I just want him and no one else. And I’m going to fight for it.
-
I come to the playground and sit on the bench, as well as every day. Every day I come here just to see Wilmer. Although he made sure we can’t be together I didn’t gave up. This time I am ready to fight for what is mine. And can you believe, we’re meeting here and meeting almost every day for three months. We both have so much free time right now, so we can do it. At least we are trying to build something again.
“Hey” Wilmer says, giving me a hug. I hug him back and we pull away smiling. He sits down and looks at Elisabeth, who is running with other kids. At first we sit in silence but it’s not some kind of awkward silence. We are just enjoying being close to each other.
“Maybe we should go for a date?” Suddenly, I suggest, making Wilmer look at me. He thinks for a moment as I play with my fingers, trying not to show how nervous I really am.
“I would have suggested that.” Wilmer sighs and looks back to Elisabeth. Recently, we avoid watching into each other’s eyes. Somehow I don’t feel comfortable when he looks at me. Honestly, I don’t feel comfortable at all.
“You asked me for our first day, now is my second first day, so it’s my turn.” I smile to him and he finally looks into my eyes. I don’t look down or away, I’m starring right into his eyes and I’m comfortable and confident. I know what I want, and I said millions times that I’m ready to do everything to get it.
“Demi, I…” He starts but I’m not ready listen to his evasive, so I cut him off.
“Just agree, okay? Your mom will watch Elisabeth for the evening and you will come to our favorite restaurant.” I say, hoping that he will agree.
“And then we will end up in our bed. In the morning we will have a fight and we will break up.” He says, shaking his head. “I’m tired of it. Let’s don’t go to the restaurant. We can have a date in the beach or somewhere, just not restaurant. And you have to promise me that we won’t end up in your bed.” He says seriously.
“I like car sex too.” I joked, making him roll his eyes.
“I’m serious, Demi.” He says and I stop giggling. I nod my head and he continues to talk. “So, I’m going to pick you up tonight, and we will go on beach date.”
“Yes.” I nod my head again and lean closer to his lips. “Can I get a kiss?” I ask and he quickly leaves a peck on my lips. I don’t even have time to react. He leans on the bench and looks to a playing Elisabeth, while I cross my hands over my chest. “Do you call it a kiss?” I ask again and he laughs at my pout. He always does that and I love it. I love his laugh so much.
Wilmer leans closer and kisses me again. This time his hand travels to my hair and holds it while our lips continue their action. I feel how his other hand travels to my thigh and he squeezes it, making me moan quietly. ;8
Suddenly I go back to reality and realize that we’re making out in children playground. I pull away and smile to him. I can’t help but giggle at his red lips. Wilmer understands it, so he wipes it away although it’s not that easy. He laughs too and wraps his hand around me.
I relax in his embrace and stare into the sky when the thoughts come into my mind again. I want to ask him one thing, probably the only thing which I really care about.
“Wilmer… What do you think… if we wouldn’t break up that time… Would we still be together? I mean would we have a family?” I ask and look into Wilmer’s face as he lets a deep breath out.
“Yes, we would have a child for sure and we would be really happy.” He says not looking at me. I open my mouth to say him about the child but nothing comes out because I know it will ruin our friendship or relationship or whatever we have. I stay quiet as he sighs again. “If we’re really serious this time, do you want to have a baby?” He asks, making me smile a little.
“If we’re really together this time, I would love to have a baby.” I look up to his face again and he gives me a smile. “And I guess we’re serious this time because, fuck, I’m getting old, you too.” I groan, making him laugh at me.
“Oh, are you afraid of being alone?” He jokes, making me roll my eyes. I am always afraid of loneliness, but not this time because I’m sure Wilmer will be with me. This time I fight harder, I put everything what I have just to show him that I can forget everything. Although he said I don’t need to do anything because he loves me and he wants to be with me, I know if I won’t fight, some bitch will stole him from me and I will be alone again.
“So beach date, tonight?” I ask again as I pull away from his warm embrace. He nods his head with a small smile on his face. I stand up and leave a small peck on his lips before turning around and walking out of the playground.
As soon as I reach home, I rush upstairs. I am so excited about tonight and although he doesn’t want that, we will end up in my bed for sure.
