Day 18

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September 18th, 2016

Castiel woke up without an alarm at 9 in the morning. He was so jet lagged. He didn't know when he was gonna leave the motel room but the mall didn't open until 10am so he just laid back down and held Dean as he had cold sweats in his sleep. Dean had been having cold sweats lately. Along with vomiting blood and coughing up blood clots. Castiel wished Dean didn't have cancer. He wished that Dean could at least go painlessly. But that wasn't a possibility unfortunately. Castiel fell asleep crying about Dean for the millionth time.
Dean awoke around noon. He got out of bed and went to the bathroom to throw up some more blood. It was almost routine to him now. Wake up. Coughing fit. Throw up. Brush teeth. Breakfast or whatever meal it happened to be. Dean did the next thing in his routine and he noticed Castiel must have took his toothbrush out of his bag last night after he crashed. Thankful, Dean brushed his teeth and ate a couple pop tarts while reading his new book until Castiel woke up. Dean finished his pop tarts and started on his Red Bull. He didn't mind that on the can it warned that people in his condition shouldn't drink it. Let alone chug a 20 ounce can in less than an hour then follow up with Starbucks. He didn't mind though. He was already dead. Deep down he really did care. He didn't want to leave Cas. He didn't want to leave Sammy. He didn't want to leave his cats. He didn't want to leave this fucking world. He had seen more of this world in the last few days with Cassy than he had in his whole life. He wanted to keep doing this. He didn't want to just die with only seeing a fraction of the world. He wanted to see all of it. Paris. London. Australia. Africa. Antarctica. Hawaii. Alaska. Panama. The amazon rain forest.
Castiel woke up to Dean sobbing but pretended to still be asleep until Dean started having a panic attack. Castiel heard Deans breath become rapid.
"Dean calm down it's okay." Castiel whispered gently as he got up and went over to Dean, placing his hand on his back and lightly rubbing.
Castiel felt Dean flinch a little at first but he felt Dean relax soon after he had tensed up. Castiel knew about his fathers beatings. He probably knew more than Dean did about his dad.
"No Cassy it's not okay. This is all my fault. It's my fault you lost your grace. It's my fault I'm going to die. Everything is my fault." Dean said between his hyperventilating.
"No Dean. It's nobody's fault. If you want to blame someone, blame me. I'm the one that came out to God himself. That was a stupid idea." Castiel whispered because if he talked any louder, he wouldn't be able to keep back the lump in his throat.
"You wanna get ready and go?"
"Yes I'm sorry, I'll put clothes on."
Castiel grabbed his Garfield shirt he had brought with him. Castiel liked Garfield. That fat cat was always in something mischievous. He put on his shirt and then put on some gray sweat pants. He'd wear jeans but Dean was wearing Jeans and he didn't like taking from Deans style. Dean was an individual. He had his own style. Just like Cas had his own style. Castiel ordered an uber from his phone and they were on their way to the Mall of America.
Dean looked out the window as they went down the highway. When they got there, they walked in through Sears. That's boring. We have that in California. Dean thought as they headed towards a huge opening in the crossroads at the center of the mall. Dean took a deep breath. He smelled Cinnabon and chlorine. Weird. He could see the Cinnabon restaurant but was there a pool in this mall? Why the chlorine? Eh whatever. Dean and Cas arrived at the Rotunda. They went to Barnes and Noble.
Castiel walked into Barnes and Noble after Dean. He knew Dean loved books so Castiel just wandered through the areas where there were no books. He eventually found his way back to Dean and grabbed the books he was carrying, taking them to the checkout and handing the cashier 2 hundred dollar bills. They then exited the book store with a heavy bag that Castiel carried. He didn't mind. Castiel then led Dean to Starbucks and let him get whatever he wanted. Castiel gladly handed the barista/cashier a ten dollar bill paying for Deans drink and muffin. Castiel watched as Dean sat outside the Starbucks and Castiel slumped down next to him and leant his head on Deans shoulder.
Dean ate his muffin then started his drink as he stood up with Castiels help. They went towards Lush because they were gonna walk the full circle around the what was it called? Nickolodeon Universe? They were gonna walk around the theme park and then go ride some kiddy roller coasters.
Castiel led Dean into a Minnesota souvenir type store. Dean found a sweatshirt and picked it up in a large. Dean could fit into a small at this point but he knew Castiel could not and Dean knew Castiel would wear his clothes when he was gone. Dean was about to pay for the sweatshirt himself but Castiel cut in at the last second and handed the cashier a 50 dollar bill.
"You realize I can pay for my own things right?" Dean asked quietly as they headed around the corner past a kiosk selling drones.
"I know you can. I just don't want you to." Castiel said happily.
"You're work Cassy." Dean said jokingly.
"I know." Castiel said with a smile on his face.
Down the next long hall of stores, there was none that peaked Castiels interest. Castiel had never been shopping. Not at a mall, let alone the biggest mall in the United States. Castiel was dragged into some candy shop by Dean however.
Dean just stood there in awe gazing at what seemed like each and every candy separately. Dean eventually snapped out of it and started looking at the candy. He filled a bag with some that he liked and went to Cas since he assumed Cas would want at least something. Dean found Cas and discovered he hadn't picked out anything. He was just staring at the huge gummy bears in confusion. Dean let Castiel pay since he knew Cassy wouldn't let him pay for some reason. Dean wandered out of that store. They rounded another corner and Dean saw hot topic. Hot topic had always been Deans favorite store. He sprinted towards it, tripping on his shoelaces on the way there. He fell but got right back up. He checked his face for blood with his hands. He didn't feel any so that was good. He felt Cassy lift him up off the ground.
"Cas I'm fine." Dean muttered, a bit angry that Cas thought he needed more help than he actually did.
"That's good. You aren't bleeding so that's also good. You sure you're okay?" Castiel asked, concerned for his husband.
"Yes Cas I'm fine."
Castiel followed Dean into the store he'd been running to. It was dark in there. And their music was loud. Dean seemed to be enjoying it, he was rocking his head to the beat of the songs. If he's happy I'm happy. Castiel thought to himself as he watched Dean excitedly examine every single thing in the store.
Dean grabbed about 5 shirts and he had some necklaces in his bundle of things he wanted himself to buy but he knew Castiel wouldn't allow that so he tried to not pick out much. He grabbed a mystery box from the shelving unit near the checkout line. When he got to the front, he glanced down and saw a patch that said I love you with a sloth on it. He grabbed it and set it on top. Castiel hadn't noticed he was checking out yet so Dean tried to hurry the cashier but it was too late.
Castiel meandered over to the checkout Dean was using and handed the cashier a few hundred dollars. Castiel took his change and him and Dean left and were on their way. They turned yet another corner and Castiel saw a build a bear. He wanted to build a bear for Dean. He entered the store and Dean followed. He took note of the sign in front that said 2 for 30$. He was gonna make Dean stare at a wall and make Deans then he'd have Dean make him one.
"Stand here and face that wall." Castiel directed.
"Why?" Dean asked.
"I'm gonna make you a bear but I want it to be a surprise. Then you can make me one and I'll be the weirdo staring at a wall. I'll make it quick I promise."
"Okay."
Castiel quickly found a cat that he thought Dean would like. He also grabbed an outfit for it. It was a AC/DC shirt and leather jacket with jeans. Just Deans style. Castiel got a worker to fill the bear and he got to add a stuffed heart into his "bear" and he felt like a child when he had to kiss it. He felt so dumb. Castiel then let Dean go pick one and told the cashier to package that one and he'd be back with someone then he'd pay for both. Castiel then went to stand in the corner, giving Dean his cue to go build Cassy a bear.
Dean hurriedly went over to the options he had for the deal Castiel had chosen. He picked a golden retriever type dog and grabbed a trench coat for it. Dean was surprised they had trench coats for stuffed animals but he grabbed it nonetheless and headed to stuff it. He picked a voice recorder and recorded a message for Cassy. He knew Cas would appreciate that when he was gone. He grabbed a heart and put it in the bear after their weird ritual of kissing the heart. He went to the checkout and named his dog for Cas. Garfield. That was the dogs name. He named it after Castiels shirt he was wearing. Dean had the cashier put the clothes in the box with the dog. Dean grabbed Castiel and had him come up and pay since Dean knew he would want to.
Castiel handed the cashier a fifty and headed back and they made a full circle.
"You still want to ride kiddy rides or do you want to go to other floors?" Castiel asked.
"Other floors. I'm not in the mood for waiting in line. Plus I'm hungry." Dean replied.
Castiel led Dean up an escalator to the second floor. Cas looked around and saw a Dairy Queen.
"That look good?" Castiel said pointing to the Dairy Queen.
"Yes. Get me chicken tenders with a coke please." Dean said as he took a rest and sat down on a cushion chair that happened to be near him.
Castiel headed to the DQ line and waited for a few minutes. They weren't that busy so he wasn't too impatient. Cas ordered his and Deans food and brought it to Dean. They ate quickly and returned the tray to the DQ. They went up another escalator. Castiel glanced around, he saw spencers and some piercing shop. Hmmm. I should convince Dean to get a piercing. Castiel evilly thought to himself.
"Anything look interesting?" Castiel asked Dean.
"Yeah I want to go to Spencer's." Dean responded.
"I wanna go there too. Would you wanna get pierced with me?" Castiel half whispered out.
"Sure. What do you want pierced?"
"I honestly didn't think I'd get this far. Let me think while we're in Spencer's."
Dean led Castiel to Spencer's and let Castiel wander away as Dean went to look at the back of the store. It was always interesting to him that they kept sex toys in that store. Once he was done laughing at the hot pink dildos, he went to look at necklaces. They had some cool jewelry but Dean rarely bought anything from Spencer's and this was no exception. Dean quickly was done with his window shopping and left the store with Castiel. They headed toward the piercing shop.
"Decide what you want yet?" Dean pondered.
"Yes. I want my eyebrow. You want to get the same as me?" Castiel asked in return.
"Yeah that sounds fun."
"Alright well here we go."
Castiel led Dean into the tiny shop. He let the lady know what they were there for and he handed over his and Deans drivers licenses. The lady took them back into a room.
"I'll go first." Dean volunteered.
The worker had Dean lay on the bed and sterilized her equipment. Dean reached out for Cassys hand and felt relieved when Cas grabbed his hand. Dean felt the instrument clamp down on his eyebrow and he felt the needle go through. He felt himself squeezing Cassys hand tighter but the pain was gone just as sudden as it had appeared. Dean looked at himself in the mirror as he listened to the lady tell him about how it would take 4-8 months to heal.
"Oh I wouldn't worry about that I only have a few weeks left anyways." Dean said nonchalantly.
"Why?" The worker questioned.
"Lung cancer. I'm fine though I don't need your sympathy."
"Okay um. You're next." she said as she had Cas lay down on the bed Dean was on a few seconds ago.
Castiel calmly laid on the bed and grasped Deans hand. He felt the girl pinch his eyebrow and the needle entered and exited.
"Son of a fuck." Castiel whimpered to himself.
"Cassy don't swear it's okay I'm here." Dean comforted him.
Castiel looked at his piercing in the mirror and took the cleaning solutions from the piercer. He had listened earlier to her speech about how to take care of it so he just checked out and they left the piercing shop. Castiel led Dean down the escalators as he ordered their uber.
Dean threw their bags in the trunk and then got in the backseat following Castiels lead.
Dean fell asleep on the short ride back to their motel but he was shaken awake by Castiel when they arrived and Castiel grabbed their bags and thanked the driver. Castiel watched with anticipation as Dean unlocked the door. Castiels arms were screaming for relief and that's what they got less than 20 seconds later. Castiel set all of the bags down on the bed they weren't using and let Dean go through them and repack his duffel bag as needed. Castiel had also brought an extra bag just in case Dean needed more space for anything. Castiels feet stung and he was exhausted. He stripped to his boxers and went to the bathroom. He then ate a snack and tucked himself into bed.
"Keep in mind we need to be up at 6am tomorrow." He called to Dean who was across the room.
"I know." Dean replied, not really paying attention. He knew he could sleep on the plane.
Castiel glanced at the clock as he felt Deans arms wrap around him and he drifted to sleep. 7:28. That gives us plenty of sleep he said before he set the alarm then got comfy again.

(A/N)

I live in Minnesota and figured I'd be able to write a good chapter about the mall of america so yeah. And the rotunda for those who don't know is a huge opening in the center of the mall. Well not exactly the center but it's like a meeting point. I am exhausted from school starting so I am just trying to keep up with my writing which is a bit hard but I'm still like 12 days ahead so I'll finish fine. I worry about nothing. Thanks for reading(:

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