Here I Stand (BWWM) (AMBW) [COMPLETED]

Chapter fifteen: Let me heal you, let me love you

I wanted to talk about it.

Damn it.

I wanted to scream.

I wanted to yell.

I wanted to shout about it.

But all I could d was whisper,

"I'm fine"

The following day I woke up late, Rajiv had already left for work, leaving me with Adaline, "Good morning, baby" I greeted Adaline "ommam- mamma-mmama" smiled her standing up, I then sat with her in my arms, playing with my necklace. That moment right there, I woulnd't have traded it for anything. My shirt was stained with crayons, baby's food and others stuff, my vision was blurry, from not wearing my glasses and I hadn't the courage to look at myself in the mirror, but who cares I was a mom and that was one of the most joyful thing in my life.

It took a while to get ready my room was a mess, there was clean laundry hanging around, and Addy, having learned how to open closets worsened the situation, after getting ready, me and Adaline went to the park, as I was pushing Adaline in the swing, my eyes spotted a young woman being mistreated by whom I supposed to be her boyfriend. Seeing that scene brought back those memories I had tried so hard to forget, and before I knew it I was sweating cold, my head started to spin and my mouth got dry.

My cellphone ringing brought me back to the reality, "Isa., it's me Rajiv, do you mind coming? Three of our doctors called in sick today" requested Rajiv in a frenetic voice, "Uh... yes, I'm on my way" I stuttered. I hurriedly hung up, cleaned my hands with some wet wipes (it helped me calm down) and picked up Adaline, after dropping her to my brother's nanny, I drove to the hospital.

Aaron's pov

"Thanks mate. I really owe you one" I said to Rajiv, I didn't care how desperate it seemed to call her in, lying about not having enough staff members, I wanted to see her and for her to open up to me. "Dude you gotta stop daydreaming..." complained Rajiv " Sorry, I can't help it, she's coming in... Don't tell her I'm here" I commanded hiding I wanted to surprise her so that she wouldn't have a way out.

Isa's pov

When I got to the hospital, Rajiv greeted me which was very unusual for him, something was definitely off, but being still too shaken by the couple at the park. A couple who needs help just arrived" he notified me "I got it".

"How can I help you?" I asked adjusting my stethoscope, as I met the eyes of the people before me my heart skipped a beat, and my mouth got dry. "It's my girlfriend she love sports but she's very clumsy. She was riding her bike when she got distracted hit a rock with her bicycle and fell on her chest" spoke for her the guy. "Ok, miss..." "Davis, and I am John Meyer" he finished off not even letting the girl open her mouth. I stretched the curtains, that separate one patient from another and started to examine the woman, "Ok, I am gonna need you to lay down and lift your shirt for me". I smiled trying not to freak out at the sight of her full of scars body, then I wore my gloves and started to gently touch her stomach, it was mapped by bruises "Just tell me where it hurts and I will stop, ok?" I reassured her.

She nodded with a submissive and pleading look, I knew that look, I could hear her screaming for help. "As I got to the upper chest she mimicked a grimace of pain "Your stomach is tense, and it seems like you have broken some ribs, I'm going need to confirm it with an x-ray, I will be right back" .

I grabbed my voice recorder which I always had with me and a portable ultrasound engine, and went back to the couple. "You have some fluid in your abdomen we need to operate to remove it" I concluded. " Surgery, is that really necessary?" John asked "Yes, you have to sign a few papers, the nurses will be in here shortly to get you ready" I explained when I was done I went away.

When she had been transferred in a pre- operation room, I went to the couple, " I am going to get you ready for the surgery" I said to Miss Davids, " Mr. Meyer, I am gonna need you to step outside and wait in the waiting room" I called his attention, "No I have to stay with her, she hates hospitals" he objected. "Don't worry, I will stay with her, plus it won't take long, why don't you go to the hospital's cafeteria?"

I took advantage of his absence to talk to the girl "How are you feeling?" I half-whispered checking if the guy was still around, when I was done I asked the girl a very simple question while pretending to check her vitals "You didn't fall from your bike , did you?" "Help, please" she cried.

We spend most of our youth studying medicine away, train stitching and suturing and operating, and being what the definition of a competent doctor should be, though along the way as we are thrown in what at times feels like a battlefield, we forget, they forget, that us too wearing white lab coats and scrubs, with gloves in our hands, standing all those hours in those sterile rooms, we are humans, and we break, and we ache...

For me that instant was such moment...

Life lesson 234: from certain things there is no healing, just a lesson to be learned