Do Not Fucking Touch Me // Reddie

Thirty Six

(Richie's POV)

I was inconsolable, waiting outside in the hospital waiting room. His uncle's face was pale. He had nothing to say. I knew he felt awful that he didn't pay enough attention or see that Eddie was in such a state of distress, but I felt worse. It was my fault. He tried to kill himself because of me. I knew it. He hated me, and although I didn't know why, I didn't care. I would do whatever it took just to see him smile again. I would sell my soul to the devil. 

Those agonizing hours really took a toll on my state of mind. If he was dead, I knew I needed to be with him. I would always love him, I would always be by his side. I promised him that. I would write a note and make sure our graves were next to each other. I would kill myself too, to spend an eternity with my love.

The doctor came out of the room and smiled. "He's going to be okay."

I began crying. I seriously thought he was dead. I was never EVER going to lose him again. 

"We had to pump his stomach. He's going to be here for a couple days, to recover, and especially since it was a suicide attempt, we need to make sure he is in stable condition before releasing him."

I leaned over and hugged his uncle as tight as I could. I had never really clicked with the man, and I thought he must be annoyed by me most of the time. To my surprise, he hugged me back. We were joined by one thing, one most important thing, which was Eddie. Eddie was so important to both of us. I knew he cared about him more than he led on, especially since he had taken on more of a paternal role for him after his mother was jailed. 

"You can come in and see him, if you'd like. He's a little out of it, still." The doctor nodded to the door. I looked at Eddie's uncle.

"Go, he needs you," he said. I smiled slightly and got up from my seat. I headed towards Eddie's hospital room.

I entered the room and the doctor stood in the doorway. I looked down at Eddie in the hospital bed. He looked horrible, but it didn't matter. I was just glad to see that he was alive. My little angel looked up at me. His eyes were droopy.

I walked right up to the bed and crouched down. I began to cry uncontrollably. He blinked up at me slowly and stared.

"Why did you do this, Eddie?" I cried.

He gulped. The doctor closed the door, clearly feeling the moment being touchy. 

"I love you," I said.

He smiled. I thought I'd never see that beautiful thing again.

"I'm so sorry," he said. 

I reached in the bed and held both his hands. "Don't be. Baby. Don't be sorry. It's okay. You're okay. That's all that matters."

"Why did you cheat on me? Why wasn't I good enough?" he asked softly. 

He was still hurting. "What? Eddie what are you talking about? I didn't-" he stopped me. "I saw you, Richie!"

I looked at him with a puzzled look on my face. 

"I saw you and Greta kiss from the bus!" He turned away and let go of my hands.

"Baby, she forced herself on me! You probably didn't see me reject her ass and shove her off! I wasn't cheating on you! In fact, when you told me to fuck off, I was there to ask you to the dance!"

He paused and took it all in. 

"You didn't cheat on me?" he asked.

"No, Eds, of course not. I love you!" I reassured him. 

He smiled slightly but still looked at his wrists, covered in fresh cuts. I noticed too. My eyes welled up but I stayed strong for him.

"Well, we can't go to the dance now, I'm stuck here," he frowned. 

I kissed his forehead. "I don't care about the dance! I'm just glad you're alive!"

We made eye contact and looked at each other sweetly. We were going to be alright. I reached down and hugged him lightly, not trying to hurt him more than he already was. 

Nothing would ever be worse than the uncertainty I had just moments before. Thinking Eddie was dead was the lowest I'd ever felt. I loved him so much I could burst. I was so thankful, to God or the Universe or whatever gave me a second chance.