Do Not Fucking Touch Me // Reddie

Fifty Seven

(Eddie's POV)

I took notes the first day of class in each of my classes. After the first three, it was time to head to our homerooms, and then we would be released in groups to lunch. I was in the B group, which naturally, went after A and before C. This school was different than my middle school, by a lot. There, we would have lunch by grades. Seventh and eighth graders had lunch together, fifth and sixth, and so on. Now, we had lunches by groups. It felt more randomized. I was worried about Richie. He hadn't fully recovered from his eating disorder yet. I knew no one would make fun of how little he ate, or how much he looked like a skeleton even now, but I knew how he thought. His mindset was that people would be watching him, seeing every thing that went into his body and forming their own ideas about it. I knew that wasn't true. He had convinced himself that's how the world worked. I didn't want him to have to deal with the stress of lunch alone.

Although, he was making friends at the rate of a normal person. A normal likeable person, someone who I felt no connection with. I was not the same. I was so shy, and all of a sudden, it was just me again. I got into my homeroom and the old man at the desk didn't even look up from reading. The book in his hands had a green landscape on the cover and the title was 'The Greatest Golf Tips and Tricks'. I went and did the usual whenever given the chance to pick a seat, and opted for the back and most isolated desk. I set my backpack down by my feet and rest my head on the top of the desk. 

I had Driver's Ed, English, and Algebra out of the way, now World History and Gym were my only concerns. The longer the day went on, the more classes I finished, the better I felt about it all. My anxiety fell piece by piece off my shoulders once realizing the day was almost done. Lunch worried me the most. That and PE, because the idea of being in short shorts in front of everyone terrified me. I wasn't the most active person. Hell, the only working out I ever did was biking with Richie. He loved to ride his bike, so I indulged in that with him. I grew tired really often, especially because of my asthma. I never carried around that stupid inhaler, but Richie always had it with him. He thought I wouldn't notice, but when there's an inhaler shaped bulge in his pocket, it was clear to see his intentions. It was like he didn't trust me to know my limits, that I was weak and I needed him to keep me alive. I detested that. I wanted to be free from my past, from the old Eddie who took vitamins upon vitamins for god know's what. I wanted to be a new me, especially with this coming year. It was high school, and everything was going to be so different. We'd make new friends and new enemies, and I guess I thought we'd have the best years of our lives. That's what everyone called it, our parents, our siblings, people in the movies. It didn't really seem that truthful, so far. 

The same boy who picked my notebook up first period waltzed into the room confidently. My jaw dropped, and I looked away immediately. Out of all the empty seats scattered across the room, he chose to take the empty one next to me.

"Eddie?" he asked. I looked over right away and acted like I hadn't seen him.

"Oh hey, Mike right?" I asked. I knew his name was Mike. I didn't want him to know that I remembered that. Then again, he remembered my name. That had to count for something.

"Yeah. Mike Wheeler." He reached out his hand. I shook it loosely. 

"I'm Eddie Kapsbrack." 

He smiled with a nod and pulled his hand back to his side. He did look a lot like Richie. He looked a little older than him, though. He had a slimmer face, hard to believe with all Richie did to prevent his from being like it was. He couldn't help his baby face. Mike had poutier lips than Richie, didn't wear glasses, and had straight hair, not curly like Richie's. 

Still, I couldn't help but stare. It sure would be nice to be friends with someone that looked like my boyfriend. I guess, that way, I wouldn't be so worried or miss him all the time. 

"How are your classes," he asked. It surprised me that he wanted to continue the conversation further than saying our last names. 

"Uh, good? I guess?" I didn't really know what to say. I never thought about my classes as good or bad necessarily, but if I had to pick, it would be bad. I didn't want to risk that Mike might not want to be friends with a loser like me, so I didn't say that. I just pretended things were fine, like I always did.

"Ehh, high school's supposed to suck," he added. It made me feel a little better. 

"Is it? I heard it was supposed to be great," I said. 

He shook his head. "Nah. Your parents and everyone tell you that to make you feel safe and ready for school, but it's not really the best time. It's okay though, if you make friends and try to have fun you can still make it through."

I looked down at my hands, held in front of me on top of my desk. They twitched upon the hard surface. "I haven't really made any friends yet," I admitted. 

He smiled. "That's okay. I'll be your friend." 

My face lit up immediately and I smiled back at him. My first friend on the first day of school. Maybe this whole freshman thing would amount to something after all and I wouldn't be all alone all the time. This was a big moment for me. I didn't want to overreact, or he might change his mind. Inside I was raving. I never had many friends. Richie and Bill had always been my best friends. Bill since Kindergarten, Richie since first grade. They were always there for me and never left my side, until now. Richie and I were separated at this new school more than ever before. I never imagined eating lunch or having class without him, but it was the new normal that I was just going to have to get used to, no matter how much I disliked it. 

Mike and I talked about what we did over the summer. I didn't have the guts to tell him why Richie was gone for some of it, but I told him about Richie. I mentioned they looked alike, and that's why I stared and didn't know what to say the first time I'd met him. He said it was okay. He said I looked like Fred Savage. I laughed. He was the kid from the Princess Bride. That was one of my favorite movies. I didn't mind the reference. We talked about how I was dating Richie, but the conversation was more about each of us. We talked about our favorite video games and movies and became quick friends. It felt like a dream. I was starting to think that at the end of the day, my first day of high school, I would be left with no friends. I would have no one to sit at lunch with. As the bell rang and the line out the door formed, I realized how wrong I was, and felt lucky. 

We went down the hall and followed the large group to the cafeteria. The room smelled of many different foods. 

"What's for lunch?" I asked, peering around heads trying to sneak a peek at what the bins of food had behind the sneeze shield of glass. 

I hated being so short. It made situations like this impossible. I had to rely on taller people around me to see. 

Mike was taller. A lot taller. He was even taller than Richie. He looked through the shoulders of other kids, and reported back to me what he saw. "Spaghetti. Looks like guts."

I giggled. Richie loves spaghetti. I was sure that if he was already at lunch, or whenever he would have it, he would be okay. He liked to call me Eddie Spaghetti, he said it fit because he loved spaghetti and he loved me. 

"One plate of guts, please," Mike said to the cafeteria workers. They looked at him weird, and handed him the plate with spaghetti and one breadstick. I opted for the same. After reaching the end of the line, grabbing a water bottle along the way, I paid for my food. Mike and I walked to the front of the cafeteria and looked at what was in front of us.

The cafeteria was huge. Tables were seemingly all full. The whole room was full of chaos, and looked like a literal zoo. Everyone was talking. Not a second of silence passed by. 

"Eddie," Mike said to catch my attention. I looked away from the crowd and saw him, sitting down at a table next to some kids. I gulped and stepped forward. I set my tray down next to him and quietly sat down. 

"Everyone, this is Eddie Kapsbrack." 

I wasn't used to being introduced, or meeting new people at all. I was comfortable in my old group, I didn't want to branch out. I never had a need to. I was always with my old friends. They were loyal to me, but now I felt so alone. Perhaps a newfound friend group could change that. I could make new friends and branch out of my comfort zone while keeping Richie and the other boys close. 

I had hope now. Hope of new friends, and this new year wouldn't be so scary after all.