What should I tell you hum? What the bloody hell should I say when you ask if I'm alright. The truth? Should I tell you the thoughts are back and they are louder this time. Should I tell you that everytime I'm cooking dinner all I want to do is grab a knife and stab myself in the neck. No. I shouldn't tell you that. What type of girlfriend tells you that. So even though it makes you mad I'll say I'm fine. Not to worry about it I'll be ok. These thoughts don't go away. They are always there pressing on my mind telling me that you're only with me because I'm all you could find at the time. That you don't love me and the I'm just a waste of space. Do you think I like this? This constant feeling of at any minute you're gonna say "I'm done with you" No. I hate it. I hate that I'm so scared that after I let you in you may leave. I let you in. I don't do that I don't take my walls down. I barely let my best friend in. But you? I took every wall I had down brick by brick and let you see the deepest darkest part of my soul. I let you see the shit that I don't even like to look at. But hey. That's what trust is. And I fucking trust you.
