I snap the hair tie on my wrist trying to subside the urge to slice myself open. Snap. Snap. Snap. My skin becomes red but the urge is still there. I snap again and my skin burns from the friction. I sigh and sit down on my bed my skin still burning. I begin snapping it again trying to help myself without hurting myself. "This doesn't work" I mutter as I snap it hard against my skin. So like always I give up and curl up on my bed tears starting to form in my eyes. Even in my dreams I'm trying not to hurt myself. I want to so bad. The urge to just a live my skin apart it getting worse. But I cant. I promised you I wouldn't and I broke it so many times. I won't again. I'll keep my promise. I'll snap my hair tie till my skin is red. I'll cry until I can't breath but goddammit I won't slice my own skin. I'll never do that again. My eyes are burning from the tears I'm trying to hold in. I guess I need to let them out.
