Artificial Water

Chapter 19🥀

Kyungsoo

Jw: Where the fuck are you??

I stared at the message until my vision got blurry from the tears and I couldn't read it anymore. I threw the phone away and it landed on the floor with a loud thud while I angrily tried to wipe the tears away. I once tried to do what I thought was the right thing and now Jongin was mad at me for doing so. I didn't know what to do about it and it hurt. Jongin kissing me had come as a surprise and the problem wasn't that I didn't have any feelings for him, it was that it felt like he was just playing me. 

I got off the bed and picked the phone up, turning it around in my hand to see if it was damaged. There were a few scratches but the screen seemed fine so I put it back in the bag before walking over to the door. It squeaked softly as I pushed it open and stepped into the room. I walked towards the couch and looked over the back to see Jongin curled up with the blanket at his feet. I reached for it and pulled it up higher over his body while I felt more tears threatening to spill. I swallowed the lump away and breathed out. I wish I could take my words back but it wouldn't be enough. To fix it I should go back to even before we met and it would take us away from each other. I leaned over him and softly brushed some strands out of his face, trying not to wake him while doing so. 

I wiped my eyes and sighed deeply before walking to the front door, turning the knob before heading outside. I ignored the cold wind creeping up my spine underneath my shirt as I shivered. The sky was dark with a few soft lights further away where people still had their lamps on. I walked over to the balustrade and leaned on the wood with my arms. The wind bit my tear stained cheeks as I watched the lights of a car coming closer until the vehicle came to a stop. There wasn't enough light to see the person getting out clearly so I kept following him until he disappeared out of my sight. I closed my eyes and tried to think about what to do to make it a little better, but instead of getting an idea, I felt fresh tears make their way down my cheeks. 

"Soo?" 

I turned around with a startled expression on my face and my beating heart only calmed down when I noticed it was Chanyeol. "Hey." I sniffed but tried to cover it up by flashing him a fake smile. "What are you doing out here?" 

"I had a late shift," he ran a hand through his hair while eyeing me up and down. "What's wrong?" 

I was about to think of a lie when I realised it was useless, it was obvious something was wrong. I looked down at my feet before answering, "I think I had a fight with Jongin." 

"Ah," Chanyeol hummed in understanding. "It's way too cold to stand here outside like that. Is he asleep?" He asked and gestured at the door with his chin. "Wanna come inside for a while?" He asked after I nodded. 

"I don't wanna bother you," I protested but Chanyeol was already unlocking his door. "Can't sleep anyway, so I'd rather have some company." He assured me with a smile while leading me inside. Even though it was the exact same apartment as Jongin had it was totally different due to the style. Chanyeol's was untidy but with a lot of modern items in it while Jongin's was tidy and cozy at the same time. The contradiction was a reflection of their personalities. 

"Want something to drink?" Chanyeol asked as he shook off his jacket while kicking his shoes off. "I can use something hot." 

"Yes, please." I walked further into the room and stared at a painting of a landscape that hung at the wall. My eyes scanned the floor and I noticed a sock laying beside the couch. I chuckled softly before picking it up. "You are so typical. 

"Yah," he took it out of my hand and I noticed his cheeks tinged pink. "Why don't you just tell me what happened instead of inspecting my home." He walked back to the kitchen and continued making tea as I sat down on the couch.

"Well..." I struggled with finding the right words and sighed. "I lied to him about going somewhere but it wasn't because I wanted to, then he followed me and we went home together." 

He handed me a cup and took a seat, waiting for me to continue, but I wasn't sure about telling him these things anymore and kept silent. He noticed and said, "it's okay, you can tell me."

I looked up at him before averting my gaze to the painting again. "He was tipsy and... he kissed me." 

Chanyeol frowned before raising his eyebrows, "I thought Jongin was lying to me and that you were dating. I know he doesn't have a guestroom so I thought it was too obvious." 

I felt heat rising up my cheeks as I folded my hands around the cup. "We aren't, he just helped me by letting me stay."

He stared at me with an expression I didn't understand. "Then what happened?"

"At first I let him, but then I remembered what he had told me when he walked away that time you helped me cook and I couldn't stop myself from thinking he was just using me."

"You told him?" He asked before taking a sip from his drink.

I nodded and bit my lip to stop my emotions from taking over me. "I think I hurt him." 

"I can't tell you how Jongin feels but one thing that I learned about him is that you can't hurt him until he cares about you. He can be really cold and people often think he acts tough but he really does't care about much. Talking has never been easy for him and when he tries and someone doesn't react the way he wants or expects, he can get mad or when it's someone he cares about, sad." Chanyeol placed the cup on the table and faced me. "It can take a while until he gets over it and it all depends on how he feels. If he indeed acted like this just because he was tipsy, he'll be ashamed and will try to avoid you. When he really has these feelings, he'll be very hurt cause he doesn't always understand people can't see what's the truth."

I thought about his words while tapping my fingers against the glass. "Then what should I do?" 

"Wait."