Remembering You

Chapter 42

We ordered dinner and I have to admit I was a bit hungry. The filet mignon sounded pretty spectacular and I was a sucker for a side of creamy potatoes. Felicity ordered the seafood gnocchi, and both Shay and Ashton ordered the rib-eye. As Ashton ordered he glanced at me with a greedy eye and a small eyebrow waggle. The rib-eye was expensive.

After ordering we sat almost in silence. The sound of smooth music as well as the sound of others chattering filled our minds and made the silence less awkward than it actually was—at least for me. My fingertip traced against the rim of my water glass and I watched carefully as the condensation of the glass started wetting the tip of my finger. Pulling my finger away I then let my thumb stroke over the wetness.

Ashton and Felicity spoke at once with an uneven, “So”. Politely Ashton let Felicity speak. Felicity nervously shifted in her seat, reaching for her wine and holding it near her face, “What is… your p-plan?” Her eyes shot to mine as she took a long sip of her red wine.

Shifting in my seat I tucked my hands under my thighs and stared up to the ceiling for a moment in thought, “I didn’t know there was a plan.” I was being honest. I spoke though in a sheepish voice that was afraid to speak this truth. I was unsure of what Felicity wanted me to talk about. What plan was I supposed to have?

There was silence. Shay cleared his throat and asked, “Well, when do you plan on coming back home?” Ashton tensed in his seat. Shay continued, “We were a little shocked when you just… when you just kind of left, Mel.” His voice was kind and it hinted his concern. As I looked at his face I saw the worry he had over his face.

It wasn’t fair to them for me to leave like I did. They deserved an explanation, but I wasn’t sure if they would believe me. I opened my mouth to talk and felt the rush of fear surround my body. I let out a desperate exhale as my eyes shot down to my lap, “I don’t think I’m ready to go back yet…” Mentally I counted to ten to relax my nerves. Counted and blinked quickly to rid the emotion from my eyes.

I could feel the stares of confusion over the Bennett’s eyes as I spoke. Ashton was still tense next to me, but even through his tense stature I felt his hand soften as it rested on my back. His thumb stroked over the fabric of my dress. My dress. This dress that started to feel dirty on me again. I looked up from my lap to only look at Ashton who gazed at me with admirable eyes.

“Wh-What do you mean you’re not ready?” Felicity’s attitude seemed to shift as she felt the energy from Ashton and I. Her eyes examined eyes, glancing back and forth in utter confusion. “I don’t understand…” Looking to Shay her voice broke, “I’m sorry I don’t understand.”

Shay stared at me and asked tenderly, “Did we do something wrong?”

“Yeah, yeah you did.” Ashton started speaking with a harsh tone. His hand moved from my back and glided against the fabric of his pants.

Felicity’s expression fell and Shay’s shifted to anger. Reaching I placed my hand on Ashton’s shoulder before interfering, “N-No.” I looked to Shay and Felicity with watering eyes, “It wasn’t you guys that made me—“ I felt my breath catch in my chest and spill over into chopped exhales.

“What she is saying is that you guys didn’t directly push her out of your home.” Again Ashton spoke with his fire tone.

I glanced at him with pleading eyes. He didn’t have to rescue me from the Bennett’s. I wasn’t scared of the Bennett’s. My mind was telling him to shut up, and a soft whisper escaped my lips. “Ashton, enough…” We stared at each other for a moment as the Bennett’s watched our interaction.

Wetting my lips I glanced back to the Bennett’s and blinked my tearful eyes. Shay was upset in a different way than Felicity was. Shay looked like he wanted to reach over the table and smack Ashton in the face. I would if I was Shay. Ashton had no place to disrespect the Bennett’s. “I didn’t mean to be such a… terrible host—“ Felicity started saying.