Welcome to L.A.

By soul rather than by blood (Unedited)

Since my uncle left, I'm alone in the dark room of the misery chamber. My grandma has been moved because she didn't need that much care. Only feet away from death the wait relies on me. I'm waiting for my dad. I have to. He needs to see her... For the last time.

The room is lit by light. I know that. But being in my darkness is like when someone is blinding itself foolishly from the sun because of that... feeling that not even the light of stars can pull you up. I used to stay in the dark because I figured that it was where I belonged for a while. Nothing got better. Not at all. I had issues with my emotions, I became out of control and each obstacle became harder to defeat. I couldn't see all the hands ready to pull me out of the black hole, so I kept fighting gravity by myself. I suffered. Uselessly... and, now, I'd do anything to get out of this darkness, see the sun, see the stars and see how my life had gone so much better because I tried to move on head up and regrets down to become a better person... I wish someone would find me and help me walk through this room without the fear of stumbling and falling again...

Sitting on the floor, laying on the cold metal bed, I'm resting my head on my arms facing my tights. Actually, I'm imagining myself face them in the dark.

When two arms crossed on my shoulder, I felt the weight of a head added to the pressure they applied to me and knew I wasn't alone anymore.

"Salut p'tit frère. (Hey, litlle bro.)" I say smirking.

"Salut la soeur. (Hey, sister.)"

"Comment m'as-tu trouvée? (How did you find me?)" I say facing him. He hesitates.

"I... asked for you." No way! He improved his English so much!!

"I'm so proud of you." All of a sudden, my face lit up because of him.

"Thank you."

He didn't have to say anything. He, simply, knew what to do to switch on the lights. Thom's my little brother. Well, he basically is since we've known each other for... nineteen years by now. His sister, Marie-Louise, and he are family to me. We grew up together, we had the same primary school, our parents have been friends since we were kids... I really missed them. I miss her a lot. Everyone who knows me knows who they are: my oldest friends. I call him my brother even though I'm wrong and he talks about me as his sister sometimes too. We are family by the sacrament of Confirmation after all where their mom became my godmother. I missed having him around. Before Dan, he was the only guy who accepted me for me...

"You... must... love him a lot, right?"

"I do." I say smiling. "For the first time, I can love someone who loves me for me and who would put my makeup away if he could..." His silence can only mean two things. "He likes me without makeup."

"Yeah, I understood."

"So what's the problem?"

"Not being a part of your life because of him."

"Don't tell me..."

"I like him... but... I don't want you to leave for him."

"You won't lose me. I left for Ottawa before having met him. I'm... leaving Canada for Cambridge and that was already the plan."

"You're amazing you know that?"

"I guess."

"I'm surprised we're still friends. We are so..."

"Different by now?"

"Yeah..."

"Marie, you and I have never been much alike either, you know."