The IT Couple

Just Let Me Explain

Ivory's POV

Everything has been so hectic lately. And way too dramatic for my liking. It's just this damn memory! I want to remember Trace. How we were. If we were really in love. Honestly, the whole idea seems so unrealistic to me. The fact that I'm a senior and I was in love? With the most popular guy in the school, the bad boy, the rich kid. It just doesn't make sense. He had so many other people to choose from and yet he chose that quirky girl in the picture? With the baggy jeans and frizzy hair. He must have really cared about me.

The thing is. Everything was starting to come back. Slowly. I would feel emotions that I never knew I could feel. It would all just sort of click. Like it took one simple action to momentarily bring me back. Sure, not remembering Trace sucks. But you know what hurts the most? Not remembering the people who have been with you for 17 years. Who have taken care of you. Nourished you. Caressed you. Supported you. Loved you more than anyone could ever love you. And I can't even remember their names. I'm a pathetic excuse for a daughter. I know they're disappointed but there's nothing I can do about it. I'm letting my family down day after day. It just seems like this memory will never come back.

~

I lay on Kyle's chest, him slowly caressing my arm. I was so comfortable and so safe. Like in this spot, nothing could ever hurt me. He had spent the night because we were just too lazy and depressed to drop him back home. I was thinking long and hard on whether or not I wanted to talk to them about... well... everything.

Macy is passed out on the couch. We nearly died when we entered the house. Everyone was so exhausted. I couldn't stop thinking about Trace. There was something about the altercation yesterday that left me utterly heartbroken. I made it clear to him that he's not ready to be apart of my life. Now I'm accompanied by the feeling of regret. Which is odd because what would I regret?

I'm also starting to get closer to Kyle. Much closer to him than ever before. He's been helping me so much that it's kind of hard to believe we've had a rough past. It's like he never left. I can't say I'm in love with him, but my feelings are getting stronger. It then takes me a while to realize that when I get my memory back, things could change. I could remember why I previously hated Kyle. I could remember why I loved Trace. Hell I might still love him! I just hope it's not too late when I realize that I might have left the best thing that ever happened to me, for someone who was willing to leave me instantly.

I couldn't get the image of that diamond necklace out of my mind. How could Trace let Emily wear it? That necklace meant so much to me. It was a symbol connecting to our past. Emily wearing it was signaling that Trace didn't care anymore. He just gave it to her, like it didn't mean anything to him! I didn't even stop to let him explain last night. I didn't need an explanation to know things aren't the same anymore. Just save me the heartbreak.

I get up from Kyle, gently kissing him good-morning. I then take a look around Macy's house, trying to pass the time. As I'm walking around, I see her dog.

"Leo! Oh my gosh, I missed you boy! You've gotten so big!" I say in a high, squeaky voice. I then stop to myself. I remember. I remember Leo! I'm almost having a panic attack, until I see Macy stopping dead in her tracks.

"You remember." She says lost. I smile at her, to assure her that she is right.

"How are you feeling?" She asks, changing the subject.

"I don't really know. I just don't want to deal with anything anymore. I want everything to go back to normal." I say, looking down, putting my head on my palms. At this point i'm desperate for some sort of direction. Some sign of hope.

Macy looks down, playing with the fake fruit on her island counter. "Normal was when we weren't friends." She says with a dim expression on her face. As she finishes her sentence Kyle walks out, looking gorgeous with his perfectly messy hair. I was almost drooling over his perfectly engineered body. His perfect abs glistening off the light, like they have never been touched. His muscles defined and relaxed. His V- thing (at least that's what I think it's called) slightly showing.