Discoveries ✔ (Divergent Fourtris Fanfiction)

Chapter 39

Tris

I have to stop myself from nervously tipping my foot on the floor, from jumping up to walk around, from biting my nails and redoing my ponytail every two minutes. For the first time since she found out, I'm thankful that Lauren knows about Tobias' and my secret. She talked Eric into letting the Dauntless initiates go first to buy me time. She told him how proud she was of them and that she couldn't wait to show him how well she had prepared them.

But, although I'm trying very hard, I can't think of a way to skip my landscape without drawing unwanted attention to me. I don't even know if I have to be afraid of my landscape anymore; maybe Tobias isn't in it any longer. I told him I wanted to sleep with him yesterday after all, but perhaps it doesn't count for my subconscious because of my cloudy state of mind.

It becomes harder to remain calm as initiate after initiate goes through their landscape and my turn is drawing nearer. I can't decide if Christina's subtle attempts to calm me actually help or make it worse by giving me the feeling that there really is a reason for which my nerves have to be soothed.

"Pedrad, you're next!" Eric barks.

Marlene hugs Uriah tightly before he leaves with Lauren, and now she and Lynn are the only two Dauntless born left.

What if I'm next right after them? It would be very much like Eric to call me in first of the transfers, me, the first jumper, the skinny girl, the stiff.

Lauren comes back in, and I wonder why Uriah follows her when the door opens again just a few seconds later.

I'm caught by surprise upon seeing Tobias. He's here! I'm so happy to see him, although I know the reason why he's here is that my simulations could get us into trouble soon. I love him for coming here to face the situation together with me.

Our eyes meet for just a second, and his face gives away nothing. He looks over all the other initiates before he goes over to join Lauren and Eric. They talk quietly, and I can only pick up single words of their conversation over the chatter in the room.

Fear landscape — instructor— supervising—interested—final exams.

It's not more than a minute before Tobias leaves again, and I'm momentarily bewildered, a hollow feeling sinking into my stomach. He doesn't stay?

Christina takes my hand, as she must notice how confused I am, so that's what I focus on until Eric calls Lynn up to go next. Raising my head, I meet Lauren's gaze and see her blink twice behind Eric's back. What is it that she's trying to tell me? Is there a plan?

There must be. Tobias would never leave me alone in this situation if he didn't have a reason to do so. Of course, he must have a plan, or he would have stayed. Different scenarios race through my mind while Lynn and Marlene go through their landscapes. Now there are only transfers left in the room.

My heart pounds madly while Eric scrutinizes us as if he tried to figure out whose fears might be the most promising to keep him entertained. Looking at him now and then earlier, while he was watching the others confronting their fears, made it obvious how he takes pleasure out of our anxieties, at least to me. To him, it's nothing but a good show. I have no doubt he'd look at all of us the same way if he was able to make us fight for him like mindless soldiers under the influence of control serum.

"I'd like to take a break, would you like to have coffee, too?" Lauren asks Eric, distracting him from us with her hand on his shoulder.

"Yeah, that'll help us stay awake during these landscapes. Their fears are kind of boring and repetitive this year," he laughs condescendingly, and I want to kick his arrogant ass for that comment.